I find myself in what I feel to be an odd or maybe even rare situation, I don't know, but it seems like I do not have a true "confidant". One would think it would be my best friend. I haven't even told him about my atheism yet. He is very close to my family and is a real good friend to my wife which makes it awkward to discuss matters of my own relationship. My wife has a few confidants (I'm not one of them) in the family. The people I'm around the most is her family so any topics involved I remain reserved on most of the time to avoid being judged. Sometimes I feel so alone. Some subjects I just don't bother to talk with my wife about because it tends to cause hard feelings. I try to pride myself on communication but it seems lately I have failed and feel there is nowhere to turn. I even have to careful what I put online because I really do not have any privacy. I was just wondering how many out there share my situation.

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Comment by Sarah on June 6, 2011 at 3:09pm

My family is theist. I know exactly what you mean. If it wasn't for my brother coming out as an atheist I'd still be a closeted atheist I think. Hang on there, don't despair.

I would suggest first approaching the subject gently, and gradually easing into it. Being afraid to be judged is natural, but conquering that fear and saying what you feel will make you feel great, really.

And in the meantime, try to find some people around who share your feelings. Is there an atheist organization where you live? Join it, you'll find like minded people who know how you feel.

This site also helps :)


Comment by Walter Maki on June 6, 2011 at 5:27pm

I have only one other atheist near by and his job keeps him gone from home a month at a time, plus he is my wife's cousin so talking about family can be tricky. Unfortunately I live in a very small (theistic) community so there is no real support for me except on this site. 

It's not just about my atheism it is also with other personal issues involving family that I feel like I don't have anyone in person to confide in.

My wife is very much loved and protected by family (and my best friend) so I have to tread lightly at times. My erratic work history is held against me and I have very little say in my own household. I was told if I really loved them I would of done more to help provide for the household. My own family (who I don't really talk to anymore) and my best friend live over 100 miles away. This might not seem like a lot to some but the finances are very tight. What definitely doesn't help is I have to periodically fight depression which no one around me wants to hear about anymore so I just suck it up and keep in buried inside. I'm not looking for sympathy, I just want someone in person I can talk to that will actually listen with out passing judgement.


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