Crazy Christian "Learn How to Raise The Dead"

You too can learn how to raise the dead. If you see someone that might be dying or is dead, don‘t call for help. Say, WITHOUT THINKING, “I command you, in the name of Jesus, to come to life, now”

Comment by William C. Walker on August 7, 2011 at 4:43pm

Boy, I can't wait to try this on someone.  Maybe me, at 85, hey it's worth a shot.

Comment by John Voss on August 7, 2011 at 5:10pm

So tell me again, like I'm a three year old, make it easy for me to understand.  WHY are we supposed to respect this belief?  These people are nuts.

Comment by Breanne on August 7, 2011 at 7:35pm

Oh, my goodness. This is just...wow.

Comment by matt.clerke on August 7, 2011 at 9:46pm
I call bullshit! pics or it didn't happen...
Comment by Dustin on August 7, 2011 at 10:04pm

@Matt.Clerke 

 

Why do you need pics?  Can't you hear the conviction in this guys voice?  He obviously thinks he raised the dead so you kind of have to believe it .. 

Comment by matt.clerke on August 7, 2011 at 10:12pm

Dustin, I command you in the name of our almighty saviours, Russell's Teapot, the Flying Spaghetti Monster and the Invisible Pink Unicorns, to go forth and seek out evidence!

 

Also, ever notice how religious people sound suspiciously like snake-oil salesmen(and used car salesmen)?

Comment by Dustin on August 7, 2011 at 10:27pm

Oh No!!!  His message!!!  He didn't get to finish his message!!!  The dead woman could have waited!!!  

This guy is truly sick.   

Comment by matt.clerke on August 8, 2011 at 12:54am

Kyle, I don't think he realise WHY his sermon was interrupted until he actually got there and saw the "dead" woman.

 

nonetheless: pics or it didn't happen.

Comment by Suzanne Olson-Hyde on August 8, 2011 at 3:56am

Oh, oh, oh, the same exact thing happened with my lovely white unicorn - she died - and I bought her to life again - does that count.

 

I feel sorry for the Africans he is peaching to - poor buggers.

Comment by Nate on August 8, 2011 at 11:50am

Heh, to quote from the MMO world: "Screenshot or it didnt happen."  I'll actually bet it happened like in the Holy Grail.

Christian: "BRING OUT YOUR DEAD!"

Villager: "Here you go, got one for you."

'Dead' Villager: "I’m not dead..."

Christian: "He’s not dead yet you can’t expect me to Raise him"

Villager "Oh he'll be dead soon, can’t you do anything?"

'Dead' Villager: "I feel better, I feel happy..."

Christian: "Um...In the name of Jesus!"

*Villager puts the dead villager down and he stands up*

Villager: "MIRACLE!"

Christain: "PRAISE GOD!"

‘Dead’ Villager: -_-

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