Jeeesh! There are so many hyper-critical people everywhere you go these days, most especially on the internet. I can't post anything, no matter how benign, without someone finding a reason to pick it apart; and they don't bother to try and be polite about it, that's for sure. It kind of makes me not want to post anything at all.  It's sad, because here on TA, I thought that I had found a place to discuss things with other people in a rational matter, but all I usually get is more of the same crap that I get if I post to the general public on my Facebook feed - which is to say idiocy, nastiness, or some combination of the two.

I have posted on this subject before and it was suggested to me that I use private messaging more than posting general replies to the whole community, but that sort of defeats the purpose of an open disussion. It's not that I don't want to know everyone's opinion, it's that I wish we could all take a moment to think of how our words are going to come accross to the other people who read our words. It would seem that there is a whole different class of people out there who want nothing more than to belittle others and be just as nasty as they can be, all over minute discrepencies in world view. I hate to say this, but it remids me of all the religious people I know bickering over which version of the Bible is "correct", or which sect of Christianity is "correct". It is very ridiculous. I can't even have a decent conversation about evolution anymore without someone coming along to call me names like "spiecist", and how dare I presume that humans are "smarter" than cockroaches when cockroaches have reached the apex of their evolution (...not sure how he presumes to know that...) and on and on. It makes it really hard to have an intelligent conversation when you have to sift through all the people being hyper-picky about the words you use, and/or constantly trying to pull you off-topic to argue with them over their petty issues.

I don't mind being corrected or told when I am wrong about something, or that there is an angle to something that I had not considered; I actually quite prefer it to running around spouting misinformation. I also enjoy getting other people's take on things so that I may consider all the angles. I just don't understand why, too often, a correction, argument, or differing opinion has to come accross as being so nasty. It's not really that difficult to leave out all the nasty words and name-calling when you are replying to a post that you disagree with, see in a different way, or have more informaion about. I mean, it really discredits your argument, at least for me, if you have to be downright nasty to me just because  we don't see perfectly eye-to eye.

I quit posting things to Facebook because of issues like this, I never expected it from this community. I guess I was naive, to say the least.

Ah... out of blogging time. Sorry to end abruptly. I would love to know what other's takes and experiences are on this topic.

Peace... Oh, sorry no time to spell/grammar check!

Views: 347

Comment by Rob the Ridiculous on June 7, 2012 at 4:37pm

I generally enjoy a good debate and don't mind to throw and receive some verbal punches. Often subjects are debated that are close to people's hearts and some of us enjoy to express that emotion in ways that others find offensive.

It does require an ability to filter a bit if you are a bit more sensitive to these matters, because there is a lot of offensive stuff out there, I am not ashamed to admit that I have done my part of that.

Comment by kris feenstra on June 7, 2012 at 7:03pm

Some of it may be people being assholes, and some of it may just be a difference in communication styles.  Some of it may be you as well.  I can't really say.  Even when I find myself in your shoes, I still can't really say.

One thing I've noticed on this site is that many users focus far more on the users that grate on their nerves than they do on the users that are actually supportive and communicative.  Some people will ignore ten civil comments just to engage, at length, with the one user who is being a jerk to them.  It makes it seem like the ratio of dicks to nice people is actually far more skewed than it really is.  I don't know if that applies to you or not, but it's something to consider and watch out for.  You can't do much on an internet forum to stop jerks from being jerks, but you can choose where to invest your own energy.

Sorry I don't have anything more useful to say.  Personally, I find most of the active users here nice enough, and many of the flare ups are actually just misunderstandings.

Comment by Mabel on June 7, 2012 at 8:52pm

Yeah, it is like that EVERYWHERE on the internet. It's just the way it is. If you find a place that does not have bad apples in the barrel, let me know lol.

You just got to keep on moving and take pleasure in the the good things you find along the way and don't let the butt heads get to you. I like your posts for what it is worth.

Comment by Doug Reardon on June 7, 2012 at 9:58pm

No matter what you do or say, somebody isn't going to like it!  And they're always happy to tell you why! 

Comment by BryanPaul on June 7, 2012 at 11:17pm

I've seen the same thing on here a few times. I don't think it's on purpose. I think so many of us have gotten to this point from debating theists and having our every word dismissed without consideration. After awhile we all get burnout from debate and become edgy. It's good to see posts like this every so often as it reminds us, we are among like minded people here and have to be open to other views. Don't take it to hard. There are some great people on here like Nelson, Reggie, (crap, if I start listing them all, this post will be pages long!) They shouldn't be personal attacks ( I think those are not permitted and if they are personal, you should tell a moderator). Anyway, I hope this eases your mind a bit.

Comment by Tom Holm on June 8, 2012 at 12:11am

well thinking that posting on TA without receiving any ridicule was wrong. no matter where you go, religioius or non religious, there will always be assholes lurking to try to challenge your every mistake and belittle any minute thing you do. thats part of life thats just how we human beings are. hell even i can be an asshole sometimes. people are either too arrogant or narcissitic and feel that they have to be smarter than the next person and if you dont believe or know the same things they know, you will receive some kind of hate or belittlement. just stay strong and hang in there because this is a great place to hang out so to speak, and for the most part there are some rational and reasonable people on this site worth conversing with.

Comment by Wesley on June 8, 2012 at 12:35am

There's no reason for people to go out of their way to be mean, rude, offensive, etc.....  Some people tend to think of internet discussions as WWE battle royals and that WINNING is the only goal..   Its not.

Communication is the goal for many people.. communication and education...  For others its about winning debates and tying people up with your verbal skills..  Its like a UFC match for them..  They develop their standup...their ground game...their submissions and their submission defense.

A lot of people aren't prepared to go to war with their discussions.  Its not about winning its about communication and learning.

I'm all for promoting and supporting communication and learning....but have been guilty of the 'other' kind of  interaction.  I think its something that we have to keep calling attention to so that we can get beyond it.

 

Comment by kOrsan on June 8, 2012 at 1:22am

Yeah there seems to be some people like that here, but they're everywhere. It doesn't matter what you write about, they just need anything to start showing the rest of us how much smarter they are than us. I too noticed that "speciest" thing you gave as an example, it mostly comes from the same people who can't shut up about their vegetarianism. One other thing is that regardless of what your point really was, some wanna be Freud or Plato will lecture you on how philosophically or psychologically you're completely wrong and that they have it all figured out because they wasted their time studying the subject in community college and therefore they're experts. While they're probably sitting there after posting their replies and masturbate in self satisfaction, that shouldn't deter you. Like I said those people are everywhere anyway. Take the good parts and don't let some hyperactive self proclaimed master-debater discourage you from sharing your opinions, you'll have much more fun that way.

Comment by Freek on June 8, 2012 at 2:10am

Hey Amy,

I agree that (sharp) criticism does not need to be accompanied by harsh words or name-calling. Personally I always try to refrain from name-calling and attacking the person in a reply, instead only focusing on their points.

I have seen some harsh words on several topics, but most of those were to people who were actively angering others.

Your recent posts (the ones I've looked through) seem to be polite, and they also seem to gather polite responses. Could you direct me to an example where you were attacked for a post or comment you made?

Comment by Suzanne Olson-Hyde on June 8, 2012 at 4:08am

I also don't understand why people get nasty. I have found that people who get nasty, and I will say, it doesn't happen here very often - it is because they are inadequate human beings - that simple, and just not worth bothering or getting upset over. I have had full on disagreements with people.

The only thing that I, as an Atheist think is - there is no god - other than that, there are many differing opinions about everything, from politics to abortion to spiritually to ghosts.

Sad to say, yes, there are moronic Atheists around, who hide behind non de plumes, just cowards.

I would say I am spiritual in is as much as I love my music, it puts me in a different dimension, away from all the crap, my favourite pastime, and it sounds cheesy and corny, I love to sit on a beach and watch the sun rise. That is my spirituality.

On somebody else's comment -  anti-theist - which means against god - NOPE - not for me, no god to be against. 

See, difference of opinion - whatever - :D I just don't believe in anything supernatural in any way shape or form. I am of French dissent, and I don't give a merde what other people think :D Works for me, don't take throwbacks seriously.

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