Are you old enough to remember this?

There was a time when TV just shut down for the night. Johnny Carson was on for about 90 minutes, followed by Tom Snyder, then some horrible programming like "Dance Fever." Eventually, there would be something with a title like "Moment of Inspiration." This was a preacher delivering a message for a few minutes. This was followed by The Star Spangled Banner and white noise for a few hours.

PSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" The sound would wake me up and I'd head up to bed.

Sometimes I would wake up before the white noise.

On one occasion, there was a "Moment of Inspiration" that I would never forget. It was a female preacher, which was very uncommon in the 70s, especially in Indiana. Her message was something I had not heard from ANY religious figure before, and have not heard from any religious figure since.

She said, "I've found proof in the bible that god is a woman."

OH BOY! I thought, as I perked up to pay close attention. I normally would blow this off and shut off the TV. But this, I had to hear.

She told a biblical story of "seven gold coins." To paraphrase, this person had seven gold coins, but one of them was missing. She looked all over to find the missing coin, but to no avail.

"She called upon her neighbors, and they came over to help her find the coin. After a long search, one of the neighbors found the missing gold coin, and they rejoiced."

(The screen fades; cue The Star Spangled Banner.)

WHAT? WAIT? BUT? I? THIS ISN'T? I! UH! UMMMM!!!

This didn't tell me anything at the time. It wouldn't be until later that I would learn that the biblical passages were open to interpretation, and that anyone could use any of them for anything and manipulate the thought, beliefs and actions of others.

Using this "logic," I could easily prove that my own mother is god.



For I asketh of her, "Doth it be possible for thou to giveth unto me a cookie before dinner?"

And she spoketh unto me, "No! Thou must not haveth cookie before dinner."

And I asketh unto her, "Why not?"

And she answereth unto me, "Because."



Is that proof enough? Depends on who you ask.