My wonderful getup allowed me to be in the costume contest. The host asked each person what they are supposed to be. Most people were saying matter-of-factly "wastelander," or some specialization of wastelander. I started to wonder--why so serious? We're adults and we look like a bunch of freaks from Fallout, Mad Max, and Doomsday. How is this not funny? Plus I was drunk. So when my turn came up, I declared with no uncertain conviction that I was Charlie Sheen from the year 2045. This was accompanied by lewd pelvic gesturing. The applause was thunderous.