Comment by Frank on January 10, 2009 at 1:41am

I am talking to someone now that is somewhat religious. As long as they don't try to force it down your throat and accept your choices what is wrong? Love is blind they say.

Comment by Kevin on January 10, 2009 at 1:42am

I think it all boils down to a couple considerations. 1) Whether or not your worldviews are so opposite as to breed resentment and separation further down the line, or 2) How you'd like your kids to be raised, should you ever have them.

I think if those two things can be reconciled and you're not with a crazy fundie who is on a mission to save your soul, go for it.

Comment by Fargone on January 10, 2009 at 1:59am

My wife is a buddhist but I don't think the subject of religion has ever really come up in any serious way. I don't think proselytising is part of buddhist thinking so she's never even broached the subject of my conversion. Outside of her quirky, superstitious bent, that I find more endearing than irrational, her religion just doesn't seem to enter into our daily lives. She does her thing (occasionally) and I don't do mine. Kids are fair weather buddhists like their mom but even less inclined to do anything religious in nature. They know all the rituals but have better things to do with their time.

So, in closing, find yourself a buddhist if you can't find a suitable atheist. I was actually told by a monk that atheism and buddhism are not mutually exclusive; an atheist can follow buddhism but I've never had any interest in following up.

Comment by Dinah on January 10, 2009 at 4:25am

hmm... well fortunately, all my loved ones are non believers =) so it gives me great advantage. As long as people mind their own business, i let them believe in their belief until they find out themselves. because it is really difficult to change someone so religious perspective of view towards something else.

btw.. awesome picture =D

Comment by SevenTenths on January 10, 2009 at 6:42am

Casual believer or the devout sort? I imagine trying to make a go of it with a thoroughly religious person would be hell on earth... so to speak.

7/10

Comment by Tim Blair on January 10, 2009 at 8:56am

Starting a relationship thinking you can change someone never works in my experience.
even if they did change, they would be different when they did, and would think differently about you.
Be honest with your self. If someone want to leave a cult, they will. get to needy and they may associate you with what they just left. Why not use the NET to find a cool atheist/agnostic partner? MUCH less baggage.

Comment by Sniz on January 10, 2009 at 11:39am

This is SO funny that you posted this, because it has been on my mind recently as well. Life decided to throw me a curve ball; not long after I decided I was atheist, I met an amazing guy...who is christian and the son of a pastor. Good grief! We both know of the other's beliefs, and are accepting of it. Does a part of me wish my boyfriend was atheist...yeah of course, but I figure his faith has made him what he is, and I love who he is, so I deal with it.

It can be tough though. Right now isn't so bad, but I worry sometimes about things in our potential future, like kids and such. How much religious exposure am I willing to let my kids have?

I guess if you love someone enough, you can try to work around and through things. If you are both staunch in your beliefs on either side...doing what is right for you may lead to divisions that aren't fixable.

Comment by Cara Coleen on January 11, 2009 at 5:30pm

I have to agree with Nancy. I couldn't date anyone who was religious because, personally, I need to be on the same level with the person I'm with. To have ANY area that was sort of taboo in our relationship seems like it could lead to problems and frustration. I guess people are all different, but I need someone I can be completely open with... because I have a TON of flippin' thoughts about life and religion and etc... I need to know we can talk about anything. I don't want them secretly worrying that Ima burn in hell when I die, either... haha! Poor things...

Comment by Tim Blair on January 11, 2009 at 6:58pm

@ Synthaetica, don't knock smoking mate, Jebus made it so fools like me get to pay tax ;-)

Comment by Mike on January 11, 2009 at 10:32pm

Really depends on how firmly they are entranced by their beliefs, and whether or not they must be attached to a fellow believer. As an atheist i dont think it's going to work if you're with the person expecting them to 'wake up' someday. If you took the approach that the person is who they are maybe you could get passed some thing. On the whole however, i think it will be very challenging to not be able to speak opening about your beliefs to them in fear of hurting thme in some wa.

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