I feel like those who are theist, use their "god" as a gateway to their problems...as a way to say "I am going to heaven if I do this, Im going to church on a week to take of the guilt from when I cursed out my mom yesterday. To me, it takes a strong indvidual to stray away from that path, and find within themselves that they do not need an imaginary man to feel like you're loved or that you do have a purpose in life. I grew up with a single mother, no father. She has supported me, loved me, and has gotten me to where I am today. Growing up I've always wondered why God would leave my mom to struggle. Why could'nt he send the right man her way after the many years that I've asked him to or better yet make my daddy love me like he should. But here I am, 19 years old, with those prayers still unanswered and I've got tired of waiting. Along side of the unheard prayers, I've come to realize how foolish I was to think that such a "god" could even exist. Why should I keep praying to this so called "god" when I get nothing good in return? I'd rather much help build humanity and provide a better undestanding world to my children and grandchildren and their children. I'd rather much live in happiness and calmness than in fear with uneasiness. I'd rather not second guess on whether I should have sex with my boyfriend, although we aren't married, than start all over and PRAY that "god" forgives me, even though I'll never be sure if he has. I can say with all honesty that I have not read the bible, BUT I have "schemed it thoroughly", and I just couldn't find myself reading an entire book on a fairytale. Not too big on fairytales. Even when I was younger I was quite skeptical on that whole "god" thing so I never went on my own will to read the bible. Sure I went to church every sunday with my grandmom-never went with my mom btw- but I never paid attention to the pastor. I never understood why these people were crying, screaming, and yelling and raising their hands in the air then in a mere 10 minutes it'll all be over. wah? It was always weird to me but I went along with it and tried to convince myself that there is a "god". I prayed every night, but stopped just a year ago becuz I felt it was worthless. I remembered when I got baptized (forgot how old I was. Im guessing 11-13), but whatever the age I was horrified. I was told that I could never sin again or I'd go straight to hell. Ha! Boy how they brainwashed me. Silly of me to believe every bit of word but I grew out of that naive stage and learned to think on my own. I stopped being afraid of all the things that I was told "god" would frown upon. I didnt become a rebel, I become a human being. A human being who isn't gonna let the tales of a magical man run her life forever. I feel free, I feel that I can now live, and I feel like we, as a community, can proceed to grow and cherish our humanity.  

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Comment by harry j milne on May 31, 2011 at 9:03pm
i agree whoalheartdly with Autumn,,i can remember as a child my mother was very sick with 'Pleurisy",and the church sent her a BILL for the contibutions she had missed while in Hospital !!  that was the beginning of the end for me ,,,,,
Comment by Autumn S. on May 31, 2011 at 9:19pm
Thanks harry. But wow. Anger just shot through my veins after reading that comment. Sorry about your mom.

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