This blog has so far been stories about my nonsensical encounters with my friend since the revelation of my atheism to him. So if you've enjoyed it so far here is some more garbage.

 

When my friend and I first started getting to know each other enough to claim "best" status we came across a very odd bit of commonality. Both my friend and I were prophesied over as children.

His came when he was just a newborn, one of the church elders came to his mother and said "His name shall be Jacob, for he will wrestle with God and become the new Israel!" So little Aaron's name was changed immediately. He says that he is still fighting with God... Yeah.

 

Now me!

 

Mine was kinda the same thing, I was a little older (5-ish) and was considering the convent because the crush I had on my kindergarten Sunday school teacher was very frowned upon (I don't remember much about her, and I'm not gay but Christians REALLY overreact to this kind of thing) any who my mom's reaction seemed to be making me hit the Baltimore Catechism with a vengeance to the point where I became a little Catholic know-it-all very early on. One of the old Mexican ladies that belonged to our very small parish grabbed me and told my mother that she saw God with me and I would one day do great things in the Catholic church.

 

Yowza.

So now I'm an atheist and he's one of those people who thinks that the bible is literal and perfect and all that jazz. Which makes me laugh because, what if those nuts turned out to be right? I am not saying that soothsaying is possible (cause I know it's not, that's why I'm here and not banging my head against a wall trying to be an influential female in the RCC). Lets just look at what these old ladies were saying and examine just how mind-numbingly stupid it is.

 

My friend is white. I mean super super Irish-German WHITE. Why on EARTH would God choose him to be a new Israel? He doesn't speak the language, doesn't look the part and it quite possibly one of the most offensive people I have ever met.

 

Me, I'm Atheist, and even when I wasn't I have always been subversive to religious authority, anything "great" I would or could do in the church would probably lead to, I dunno...more wars or something.My first crush? A woman. The reason I was considering nuning it up? I ALREADY knew that being a woman in the church meant no power...unless you were mother Theresa, and then suddenly everyone wanted to hear you. So in my 5 year-old mindset the only way I could get the grown-ups to leave me alone was to be the bossiest boss I could be.

 

Of course when I bring this up to BFF he says that mine was probably wrong because it was a Catholic.

*head+desk= headesk*

 

-C

 

 

 

Views: 7

Comment by Jacob LeMaster on May 27, 2011 at 3:49pm

You have the "patience of a saint" to be able to deal with that guy...

 

~facepalm~

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