A few days ago I had an epiphany.  I was explaining to someone why it is more logical for the Big Bang to have brought the universe into existence than for a supernatural supreme being to appear, as if by magic, then 'him' creating the universe.

I explained that if we assume that we need a designer, an all powerful deity, to create the universe, earth, humans, etc. then the natural assumption would be that another more powerful and complex deity would be required to create that deity and so on.

Effectively we would need to have deities all the way up to infinity, each producing sub-heavens and sub-deities.  And that's when it hit me, I have invented a new religion!

I (naturally) would be the head honcho, I would get to commune directly with the (deep, echo voice) Infinite Deity, passing down His Wisdom (my wishes) to all the other followers.  I would operate it like a pyramid scheme. New followers would start with worshipping Deity Primus (and me) and then they would go about converting others to the Ultimate Religion (cool name huh?).

Followers would 'level up' the deistic chain every time they doubled their converts. One convert and you get to worship Deity Secundus (and me), two converts for Deity Tertius (and me), four for Deity Quartus (and...you get the picture) and so on.

Now, as you can see, I have given this deep thought; administration could be a nightmare, and although I intend to run this as an on-line religion (hey, it works for banks and Amazon) I would need headquarters (with several bedrooms, swimming pool, gymnasium, sauna, hot tub, all the basic necessities.)

In order to employ a team of (young, nubile) administrators I would need funding.  I would require a charitable donation of just one dollar/pound/rupee/zloty/whatever per devotee, the 'converter' would keep a small percentage to encourage more conversions to be made (20%? What do you think?  To much?  Okay 10%) the rest passing to the Infinite Deity's charity (me.)

So I was going to run this on my blog here as a sales pitch, see how many of you I could convert to my new religion.  Then I read the Blog Guidelines.  No proselytising!  Damn, that ruined my plans for world domination and being rich beyond my wildest dreams.

So you can see why I am more than a little miffed, my plans thwarted before they even started.  Now, where did I put that drawing board?

Views: 72

Comment by Tim Hopwood on May 4, 2013 at 8:34pm
I like it! Maybe we could strike a deal where I'm an esteemed disciple bathing in the reflected adulation of The Great Master, much like the bass player in a band who takes the nubiles that the lead guitarist doesn't have time for. You gotta leave some for the little guys.


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