Living in Oklahoma can be hellish at times. I have to keep telling myself, "At least you don't live in Kansas. You could have been born in Kansas." Don't get me wrong, I'm proud of the progress that my state has made in recent years. We're gradually becoming a tolerable place to live. However, I do plan to get out of here as soon as I can.
I haven't even tried to date anyone in almost two years now. It's pointless. Sure, I'd love to have some fun with a girl, but fun for me includes having an intelligent conversation now and then. I don't feel like it's possible to really have a good, inellectual discussion with someone who believes in and worships a sky ghost and zombie Jew. Am I an asshole for being so picky? Does this make me intolerant? I do have good friends who still believe in this nonsense, but there's no way I could have a romantic relationship with a religious person.
I've pretty much given up hope of finding anyone in Oklahoma. I've developed social anxiety disorder and depression because, I think, there is no future for me here and every minute is misery. I hate to bitch like this, but fuck it. Every time I start to really like a girl, I get one of the same responses. "I just can't date an atheist." "I can't date someone if they might end up in hell." Like that's gonna make me hate religion any less. I'm sick of this shit. Time to start staring at apartment ads in LA again like they're porn.
Comment by Nelson on March 10, 2011 at 8:44pm keep your chin up Brandon!
(also, there's a gorilla behind you...)
Comment by Brandon Bourassa on March 10, 2011 at 8:45pm
Comment by Nelson on March 10, 2011 at 8:47pm That's the beauty of technology. A website like this can open opportunity to meet new people who have the same, I guess lack of belief you do! I dunno about Oklahoma, but I bet you'll have much better luck in LA!
My b/f is a christian, kinda. Well, he used to be. He's very open-minded and just the other day he told me that the conversations that we have had has taken a tole on what he believes and used to believe in. I actually think he is scared of Hell and that's why he won't give up that silly delusion of his. But, we don't let his beliefs and my lack there of to interfere with our relationship.
Comment by Brandon Bourassa on March 10, 2011 at 9:11pm I do have a lot of online friends and freethinking friends, but that can only keep me happy to a certain point. I know I place too much importance on romantic relationships, but I guess that's just who I am.
I don't think it would be a problem for me to be with someone who is open-minded, but still believes in fairytales, as long as they don't constantly try to "save" me. But that seems to be too much to ask for around here. I even had a girl lead me on, all the way under the covers, only to tell me that she would only sleep with me if I became a Christian! This is the truth!
Comment by Greg Donald on March 10, 2011 at 9:35pm
Comment by Mason on March 10, 2011 at 9:36pm If those girls make judgments based on your atheism vs actual personality characteristics...fuck 'em. You really don't want to date a girl like that anyway. I did, once. And to this day, we cannot have a conversation in which she doesn't try to convert me. At one point she literally told me, with a smile on her face, that the world would be a better place if all non-christians (including myself) were dead.
Trust me, it may suck now, but you will find a girl who won't make value judgments like that based on what god you do/don't believe in. The ones who do make those judgments aren't worth your time to begin with.
Comment by James on March 10, 2011 at 10:23pm Chin up Brandon... I know how you feel about wanting intellectual conversation too. That's actually a great feature of my wife. While she is Wiccan, we can literally talk for hours about science, philosophy, theology, etc. We did meet online, so you might want to try that out. Also, look up meetup.com and see if there are any Atheist groups remotely close to you. I was surprised to find two fairl close to me. Good luck on the plans for LA, but in the mean time I'm sure there are ways to make like in OK more tolerable.
Cheers!
Comment by Brandon Bourassa on March 10, 2011 at 10:37pm Thanks for the words, guys. I've actually tried online dating. It's not for me. Haha.
Plus, I feel like I'm cheating if I do that. I should be capable of actual human interaction. Not to say that people on those sites are not. I just expect too much of myself.
Comment by Evey on March 10, 2011 at 11:20pm I hear ya, buddy. I'm in central Alabama and let me tell you, if you even breathe in a non-Christian manner, they swarm from miles around to alternate between trying to 'save' you and telling you how damned you are.
My fiance is a nonpracticing pagan, and we met in a little town right outside of Montgomery. So chin up! If it can be done here, it can be done anywhere. :)
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