I like blogging about my atheist thoughts but I wanted an audience. See I'm still pretty closeted, I'll tell people at school that I'm an atheist but when sitting at home on my parents couch, as I am now, I  am nothing more then a rebellious kid who doesn't like to wake up to go to church on Sundays. Too bad I'm 21. 

Actually I'm at that awkward age where I don't realllly have to obey my parents but on the other hand I do; They still help me out financially with school and rent. I have a huge feeling that this generous funding would stop if I were to announce my true intentions for skipping sunday school since I was 14. 

Well life at home has become increasingly more annoying since my last stay here over the summer. My parents church is trying to move into the 21st century and my parents are embracing it completely. My dad is heading session and is responsible for the new contemporary service which my little brother now plays the drum set for. My mother has started her own sunday school class for middle-aged women. Every where in my house there is a book, a book on tape, three more books, on how to bring the congregation into this new age, how to teach to a population losing interest in god, and how including god in your dieting plan will make you healthier and happier! 

I imagine the day of my graduation someone will offer to pray over dinner and I will completely explode with 22 years worth of oppressed anger building up inside me. Most of all I am angry, angry that I cannot be myself and this is something I will have to overcome. Nobody likes an angry atheist. 

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Comment by Cristynfaye on November 29, 2011 at 10:59pm

I feel for you, friend.  That's a tough situation to be in- I know all too well what it's like to be stuck in that place in between adolescence and adulthood!  But it doesn't last forever.  Sooner or later you'll be on your own, making your own decisions about where to be on a Sunday morning. (Believe me, I've moved in and out of my parent's house several times in the last 13 years of my adult life- including recently having to live with my mom, as a married, 31 year old grown woman with a career.  It was awful.)

 

I can imagine too how there would be a lot of pent up anger and irritation.  I don't really have any good advice for you, because I don't know your family, and every family has different dynamics...but I just wanted to say I can empathize, and I'm sorry you are in this situation.

 

*Hugs*

Cristyn

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