How I became an atheist. ( From an ex-muslims perspective)

 To start off as a child I was born and raised in muslim house hold , I believed it and never questioned it . I remember as a toddler that my dad used to take me to the masjid with him and he taught me how to pray to allah. I also used to see my mom wearing her veil and reading the koran especially during Friday and ramadan. Although my mom doesn't like to wear the hijab she wears tank tops and tight jeans and also my dad he doesn't want my mom to wear the hijab. But her family are devout muslims they sometimes pressure her to wear it. also my older brother who is also devout used to force me to go to the masjid with him. As a kid I was moderately religious didn't take things seriously but from the ages late 14 to early 16 I devoted myself to Allah, I prayed all the 5 prayers every single day but couldn't help but to masturbate. I remember as a kid that playing with yourself will make you pee yourself , get STDS , AIDS, UTI and you will suffer from testicular or prostate cancer and heart disease. At around 16 1/2 I started praying less fasting less in ramadan but I still labeled myself as a muslim and then I started to see how corrupted most muslim majority countries are and how terrorism spreads so fast like a virus. One time our religious teacher and many imams used to tell us that music is haram in islam , pleasuring yourself and dating and I started to question why are these things that make you feel good restricted in islam is islam supposed to make your life easier and make your live a happy life, but I still did these things except I never found a girlfriend . Anyway I was taught that the only true religion is islam , but then I saw other religions like christianity and judaism claiming themselves to be the true religion, this has got me thinking if every one of them claims it's true then which one is the right one? What if islam was wrong? Why would god send people to hell for just having different beliefs ? If the koran states that who wants to believe , they believe, if they want to disbelieve , they are free , then why do apostates get killed for just leaving islam ? Why do they get negative reactions from their family members ? Why is there a lot of intolerance for non-muslims? And when I used to discuss about murder my family didn't give a sh!t and used to tell me it's wrong to kill, but when I used to talk about sex they would reply astaghfurallah meaning that this is evil and from satan and I was like wtf killing and stealing is much worse than fornication and adultery,and why do women have no rights in islamic societies as well as judeo-christian societies, why do they have to cover up and also islam views women as sex objects . At 17 I came across hell and started to think critically about hell it is the most ridiculous concept I've heard for not following a certain rule or praying etc , it is also stated in the koran that God created life and death and the good and the evil to test your deeds but the test is very limited and you would burn in hell if you were bad for ever and also if god knows everything then he knows who is going to hell and who is going to heaven and he doesn't want us to do the sins , then why doesn't he make us not do it? When I read the koran or the bible god resembles a human who wants you to recognize him abide by his rules , obey him , to thank him . Also why are many innocent children in Africa dying from malnutrition and is making the rich or the middle class happy , why am I a social outcast in middle school and get bullied If I prayed to god ? And if there was a god he wouldn't be that cruel and not approve this right? This made me become an agnostic . Also evolution makes a lot more sense to me because I've experienced observation like how the monkey is similar to the human being , and how taking antibiotics changes the structure of the bacteria and how every human looks different from the other. This is how I became and atheist I am an 18 year old guy living in Lebanon it's still better than her Arab neighbors but society is religious I don't want to shove my secularism down other people throat because I know how it feels to have some religious zealot doing it to you another thing is that only some of my close friends know that I'm an atheist but I would never let my family know about it also I don't hate religion I think it could bring mental and psychological support for the poor and unfortunate but I also know poor and unfortunate secular people who choose reason and logic over faith. , I want to encourage freedom of expression , speech, belief, and thought . Also people must have the right to have freedom from religion. I apologize for my poor English skills as I learn it as a second language.

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Comment by Thomas Blood on November 3, 2013 at 6:55pm

Living in your part of the world must be difficult enough without having to swim against the cultural tide you face daily. I can only admire your clear thinking and empathy for those around you. I hope we Americans don't sound like a bunch of whining ninnies.  Most of us have it so easy in comparison. I have never felt that my atheism, if known to everybody, would put me in any physical danger.  There is some great science available on the internet. One of my favorites in edge.org, a site with some very cutting edge science presented for lay people like us. You clearly have a aptitude for scientific inquiry.  Nourish that gift.

Comment by jb2013 on November 5, 2013 at 3:16pm

Keep safe. I live in a free country, but if I want to keep my job I don't tell people my religious beliefs unless they talk first. Some people just don't need to know what you think. In this country it is ok to say "I am a Christian" But if you say "I am an athiest" they may not say anything back but you may be treated differently after that if you are in the public eye.

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