So here it is, getting close to the end of the day in the Mountain Standard Time Zone. No rapture, no excitement, no intense shaking of the ground beneath my feet. How did Harold Camping get it so wrong?

Let's just say it's in those numbers he's been playing with. He forgot one important step, which I will now correct for him and give you the real date of the rapture. You see, Harold forgot how much the lord loves things in threes. Father, son and holy ghost. Jesus rising three days after his brain stopped functioning. The Ark of the Covenant contained three sacred objects. David “bowed down before Jonathan three times, with his face to the ground” and Daniel regularly prayed three times a day giving thanks to god. I could go on and on and on. Three truly seems to be the magic number.

So Harold isn't finished yet, for he has only predicted the rapture twice. The first was September 6, 1994, and of course today's prediction, May 21, 2011. What good is that?! Perhaps he was thinking of the old "animals came two by two" business, but Genesis 7:2 reads "Of every clean beast thou shalt take thee by sevens, the male and his female." So really, two was not the obvious choice, quite poor really. What we need form Harold Camping is a trinity of predictions to make sure we get to the final end of days calculation. So, between the two now historical Camping dates of doom there were 6,102 days. Note that the numbers 6, 2 and 1 are in this number as well as Camping's prediction dates. Spooky. Now, it would seem reasonable that to find the next date, one should simply add the days between doomsday one and doomsday two. The lord would appreciate balance between rapture dates, I am sure. It gives folks time to recuperate from the disappointment. Now, adding 6,102 to today's date would bring us to February 3, 2028. Holy trinity Batman! There is the three we are looking for! Incidentally, 3 divides into 2028 exactly by 676. I have no idea what the significance of 676 means but it seems too important not to mention. 

There you have it. Harold Camping got it wrong simply because he wasn't reading his bible numbers correctly. Now that I have shown him the error of his ways, he can comfortably state with absolute certainly that the third time will be the charm. Start putting away some dough, we're going to need some new "Save the date!" billboards.

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