I don't fear death itself, but I'd be lying if I said the thought of not existing didn't make me uneasy. I admit it: I think about dying often, probably too much. Thing is, I'm not in anyway suicidal or depressed. I have this kind paranoia; I feel as though my life (so far) has been a rip off. There are certain things I dream of experiencing, or enjoying before I go. I know, however, that life is completely random. Things could happen, and I might not be here tomorrow or the next day. I worry at times that I will never be able to experience the things I feel I deserve to, things I feel I've suffered for and earned. Life isn't fair, it just is. I know worrying won't change this and I know being paranoid won't help. This doesn't affect my life in any serious way; they are but fleeting thoughts. Some days I just wonder if I'm not living for nothing. The best option is to wait and see.