at present i’m being held

hostage

by the likes of ragweed &

goldenrod---

yes, right now my whole VW-bus of a

head

is being dealt with in a very

hostile

manner,

by these two worthless plants

which at a certain time of the year

in certain parts of the world,

get to wreak havoc upon all who

stroll outside

downwind of their allergenic weapons

of mass sniffling,

mass itching inside the ears where you

can’t get at (you stick your fingers in to

ITCH ITCH ITCH!---but you always

come up emptyhanded),

& worse yet---

the mass itching in the back of the throat

(up top, where you try and roll your own

tongue back to itch it with the flexing

tongue muscle, but alas, nothing!).

 

and while my eyes water & itch as well---

i found out from a merciful pharmacist a few years

ago

that simply rubbing a bit of

hydrocortisone

right in the small of the eye socket

where the eye meets the tip-top of the

nose…well,

once you perform this little task,

relief will be yours, my friend.

 

in fact, that’s pretty much how that wonderful

peacemaker,

stopped the war that was being wielded in my eyes

(that never-ending struggle between the rebel eyes

trying to wrestle freedom to breath & stop tearing & itching,

from the clutches of the oppressive dominant hand’s

itching knuckle---which attacked & attacked so

ferociously).

 

and as i sit her with my nose dripping over

my keyboard

waiting for that claritin to kick in,

i think about those people that are allergic to

yellow #5

&

red #40,

which both exist in food, drugs & cosmetics---

that means everything from

cotton candy to soft drinks to soaps, shampoos,

crayons, antacids, & even prescription drugs

are off limits to these

folk.

 

and as an Atheist, i have to go one step

further in my brainstorming

because i have to wonder about those

staunch believers in god or whatever

creative deity(ies) that they pin their

hopes

on---

because if you are allergic to something that

naturally occurs on this earth,

much like when bill hicks did his bit about

marijuana being a naturally occurring drug---

well,

doesn’t that mean that your

god

made a mistake?

 

hicks didn’t live long enough himself to take

that joke one step

further

to discuss the allergies that people have to

dyes

that we humans created

ourselves.

 

it is as if zarathustra himself came down from the

hills

and stepped into the labs

for the benefit

of all the little kiddies breaking out in

hives

& itching themselves

bloody.

Views: 33

Comment by Doug Reardon on May 15, 2011 at 10:48pm
I read somewhere (Science News, I think) that Goldenrod season has increased by a month over the last few years!
Comment by delapruch on May 16, 2011 at 2:39pm
@ Doug Reardon.  ugh.  lol : )

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