Hi all! I figured it's about time for my first blog post and I also have something that I would really love to hear opinions on.

I'm from the Bible Belt and the dating pool for an atheist is pretty small here. Also add in that I just got out of a 4.5 year relationship, (where I always avoided religion talks with the very religious boyfriend), it's been tough. So I recently joined a dating site. And it's amazing because it seems like people are less afraid and will happily tell you their beliefs. There's also a search option to select if you only want to find people that are agnostic or atheist. Haven't been on there long, but I love and I've let my guard down.

While on this site I assume if a very religious person sees my profile, they'll see that I'm an atheist and move on. No big deal. I'm not an option for them. But some random guy that lives hours away from me decided to find my profile and call me out on it. Out in public if I'm having religious discussions or tell people I'm an atheist, I'm prepared for the reaction and I'm able to remain calm. I was not prepared to receive this message:

"There is a God hun. I don't know why you dont believe in one but I hope you relize he is real. Remember when you change your mind all you have to do is say *Heavenly Father, I know that I have sinned against you and that my sins separate me from you. I am truly sorry. I now want to turn away from my sinful past and turn to you for forgiveness. Please forgive me, and help me avoid sinning again. I believe that your Son, Jesus Christ, died for my sins, that He was raised from the dead, is alive, and hears my prayer. I invite Jesus to become my Savior and the Lord of my life, to rule and reign in my heart from this day forward. Please send your Holy Spirit to help me obey You and to convict me when I sin. I pledge to grow in grace and knowledge of you. My greatest purpose in life is to follow your example and do Your will for the rest of my life. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.* Hope you think on this."

It pissed me off. I know this isn't a drastic and hateful message but it just rubbed me the wrong way. I was not prepared to come across this on this site.

This was my response:

It's people like you that have driven me to a dating site. The ones that are so sure they're right about god that they bay like a donkey and damn you to hell once you say otherwise. Texas seems to be infested with them but only because they scream and shout and take drastic measures. You make us hide in fear, but not from hell, from your constant badgering and trying to shove your beliefs down our throats. Here I'm able to find people who aren't afraid of saying they're atheist or agnostic. There's even a nifty little option for the search if you only want to look at a certain religion. Why have you found me and decided to send me this crap?

You say you want a girl who is intelligent in science. Finding someone who is actually intelligent in science and is a christian is like find a needle in a haystack, bub. Unless you mean "intelligent design" and that is not a science at all.

I could on and on and tear you a new one but I think I'll stop with this:

Live a good life. If there are gods and they are just, then they will not care how devout you have been, but will welcome you based on the virtues you have lived by. If there are gods, but unjust, then you should not want to worship them. If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones.

I was just going to delete his message and ignore it, but for some reason it really got under my skin and I had to respond. This is also a very tame response from what I was originally planning to say.

What do you guys think? Did I overreact? How would you have dealt with this?

Views: 368

Comment by kOrsan on May 10, 2012 at 6:01pm
Comment by Mabel on May 10, 2012 at 6:33pm

Way to go! I loved your response!

Comment by Dennis Weaver on May 10, 2012 at 6:45pm

The only thing I would wonder in this scenario is if this genius would even be worth replying to. But I think you're good on calling him on it!

Comment by Josh Leach on May 10, 2012 at 10:57pm

I would be very interested to here if he responded. But I personally, don't think you overstepped your bounds their. If he's forcing his belief on you, you may as well state your own. I see absolutely nothing wrong with this. 

Comment by Tom Holm on May 11, 2012 at 1:12am
What overreaction? I didn't see no overreaction.
Comment by Rachel on May 11, 2012 at 4:48am

I don't see that as an overreaction. He came at you with his nonsense, and you responded to it. Sure, you could have deleted it and forgotten about him, but he might have come back. He might not. But, the way I see it, if he's so bent on pressing his beliefs on you, then you have every reason to want to tell him what you believe and why you don't appreciate that kind of attention. If he keeps pestering you, I'd suggest blocking him, if that's possible.

Comment by Suzanne Olson-Hyde on May 11, 2012 at 6:29am

I am really pleased you wrote back - it is a really good vent - bet you felt better after it. You put him back in his little box. Bravo you.

Comment by Mo Trauen on May 11, 2012 at 9:34am

Excellent response!  Very polite and very well put.  Not an overreaction at all.  In fact, I may borrow parts of it myself when the occasion arises.

Comment by Bev Walker on May 11, 2012 at 9:49am

I don't think you overreacted at all, he had already stepped on your toes, so tospeak, by disrespecting your atheism. I'm sure you wouldn't have deliberately sought out a christian, muslim etc on the dating site & sent them a message telling them why their religious views were wrong, so the same must reply in reverse.

It would absolutely have got under my skin in the same situation too.

Well done for your measured & firm response!! And good luck in the world of love :)

Comment by Bev Walker on May 11, 2012 at 9:49am

* the same must APPLY in reverse, I meant lol.


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