All Blog Posts Tagged 'religion' (328)

The One That Got Away

If you are swallowed by a whale, how can you resist standing up through the blow hole like the sun roof of a limo? Jonah and the Whale

Jonah 1:1 to 4:1



1:1 Once upon a time there was a Jewish guy named Jonah. The Lord talked Jonah. He said "Jonah, go over there to that extremely distant city of Nineveh. Let the Ninnies know that I have noticed their wickedness, even from way over here. I’m not blind. And I'm not just watching and judging…

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Added by Brad Snowder on February 24, 2013 at 2:30am — No Comments

How do people like this get elected..??

Louisiana Revelation: School Voucher Funding – It’s Not Just For Christians Any More

Jul 5, 2012 by Rob Boston in Wall of Separation

A member of the Louisiana House of Representatives who eagerly supported Gov. Bobby Jindal’s plan to fund private schools…

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Added by Rob Klaers on February 20, 2013 at 11:51pm — No Comments

Free Slaves

Your taxes at work. Cursing the Edomites

Obadiah 1:1 to 1:21



1:1 The point of view of Obadiah.



1:11 The Lord thinks this about the Edomites. They stood back and laughed while Jerusalem was destroyed. Truth be known, they even aided in the destruction. …

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Added by Brad Snowder on February 16, 2013 at 1:04pm — No Comments

Burn Ban Lifted

OH MY Judgment Day

Amos 1:1 to 9:11



1:1 These are some words blurted out one day by Amos.



That’s Mr. Amos to you.



The Lord says he has three or four damn good reasons for sending a nasty horrible fire to burn up all of the nations in the…

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Added by Brad Snowder on February 10, 2013 at 3:38am — 1 Comment

Bugs and Worms

They started out practicing under our garage. Valley of Jehoshaphat

Joel 1:1 to 3:2



1:1 OK, here it is, the word of the Lord that just happened to come to Joel one day. It just popped into his head. And the word is that the crops not eaten by worms are eaten by locusts and the crops not eaten by locusts are eaten by worms.



2:1…

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Added by Brad Snowder on February 3, 2013 at 12:14pm — No Comments

Like Your Mom

A true lady takes off her dignity with her clothes and does her whorish best. ~ Robert Heinlein Reaping the Whirlwind

Hosea 1:2 to 8:7



1:2 The Lord ordered Hosea to marry a prostitute because the Jews were doing whorish things. It seemed like a reasonable demand. So Hosea married a hooker named Gomer and she had children who were given long terrible names by God himself.



2:2…

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Added by Brad Snowder on January 27, 2013 at 11:50am — No Comments

Don't Eat Me Bro

Gravity is only the bark of wisdom's tree, but it is what preserves it. ~ Confucius 500 BCE The Lion’s Den

Daniel 4:4 to 12:13



4:4 King Neb dreamed again and this time he remembered what it was about. It was a tree. The tree was a giant beautiful tree that everyone loved. All the people and animals lived together in and under and around the tree. But then a scary messenger appeared from some vague alternate dimension and began…

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Added by Brad Snowder on January 20, 2013 at 11:17am — No Comments

But it's a Dry Heat

Geene Courtney, Sausage Queen. Sponsored by the Zion Meat Company during National Hot Dog Week, 1955. The Fiery Furnace

Daniel 1:1 to 3:30



1:1 The Lord allowed King Nebuchadnezzar of Babylon to conquer Judah and take the Jewish people captive. King Neb called his number one chief castrated slave and told him to pick some of the brighter Jews to come live in the palace and learn to speak the local language. One of them was Daniel. The…

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Added by Brad Snowder on January 12, 2013 at 10:34pm — 1 Comment

Dem Dry Bones

Figuratively speaking... The Valley of Dry Bones

Ezekiel 18:1 to 48:35



18:1 Repent for your sins and God will have mercy. It's not your father's fault you’re being punished. God judges you individually. Sin, sin, sin, tsk tsk tsk, your sins have been many. The people of Tyre are a bunch of sinners and the Babylonians will beat their asses and punish…

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Added by Brad Snowder on January 6, 2013 at 11:54am — 2 Comments

The Death of Liberty: Denny Burk, Hobby Lobby, and Religious Tyranny

In America, religious liberty is disappearing, or at least that is what Denny Burk would have you believe. In a …

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Added by Jeremy Barger on January 1, 2013 at 1:40pm — No Comments

No Cake for Me Thanks

Port-o-Fess, for the priest on the go. The Son of Man

Ezekiel 1:1 to 17:24



1:1 One day when I was with the captive Jews of Babylon, the heavens opened and I saw visions of God himself. I saw a huge stormy thingy with flashing lights and some weird multi-winged, multi-headed monsters. They were like part ox, part lion, part man, and part eagle. It was so scary. I…

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Added by Brad Snowder on December 30, 2012 at 11:04am — 3 Comments

Cry Baby Cry

Photographer Jill Greenberg's latest exhibition, End Times, features children crying - like the child seen here in 'Shock.' The children are provoked by Greenberg taking away their candy or toys. This technique is known as manipulation. Lamentations

Jeremiah 1:1 to 18:1



1:1 The sad miserable tidings of Jeremiah, into whose mouth many words were put by the Lord.



1:4 God knew me before I was even in my mother's belly. Before I was even a sperm. Then when I became a fetus he decided he wanted me to be a…

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Added by Brad Snowder on December 16, 2012 at 2:33am — No Comments

Woe to the World

Jambi: 'The wish is granted. Long live Jambi.'                 Pee-wee: 'Thanks Jambi!' Prophesy of Doom

Isaiah 1:1 to 66:1



1:1 The hallucinations of Isaiah, the son of Amoz, which he saw concerning Judah and Jerusalem back in the days of Uzziah and a bunch of other kings.



1:2 Ok listen up. God says he has taken good care of you up until now but you are all a bunch…

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Added by Brad Snowder on December 9, 2012 at 2:39am — 2 Comments

An Old Fashioned Love Song

You're as young as you feel. The Love Poem

Song of Solomon 1:1 to 8:11



1:1 This is the best song of all the songs. It was composed by Solomon. Let him kiss me right on the mouth with his mouth.



Your love is better than wine and you are well known for your savory skin lotions. That’s why the virgins all love…

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Added by Brad Snowder on December 2, 2012 at 2:28am — 1 Comment

~~Religion is Politics~~

In this country, the country of Saudi Arabia, there are living creatures that resembles us humans. Sorry, couldn't help but start with sarcasm. There are humans, not very intelligent ones. These -not so intelligent- humans make up about 80% of the population. What you are about to read is not an exaggeration. In fact, I might be a little conservative.

The government of Saudi Arabia plays with these humans as they see fit. A current situation, for instance, in the light of the revolutions… Continue

Added by mohammed ibrahim on November 27, 2012 at 11:41am — No Comments

Happy Happy Joy Joy

Angry Preacher is angry. The Preacher

Ecclesiastes 1:1 to 12:1



1:1 The words of the preacher, the son of King David in Jerusalem.



Everything is nothing, absolutely nothing. Everything is absolutely nothing. People live and people die but the Earth just keeps on keeping on. The sun rises and the sun sets.…

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Added by Brad Snowder on November 25, 2012 at 3:24am — No Comments

Catchy Lyrics

Quick Draw McGraw, alias El Kabong (1959–1962), written by Anonymous. Hymns of the Lyre

Psalms 1:1 to 1:150



1. You would do well to follow the Lord's rules, otherwise you will suffer mightily I assure you.



2. The kings of Earth think they can gang up against the Lord but he is laughing. Bwahahaha he will smash them to pieces like a clay pot. I however,…

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Added by Brad Snowder on November 11, 2012 at 10:15am — No Comments

The Last Laugh

What is light without dark? God and Job

Job 19:1 to 42:10



19:1 Both God and Satan remained quiet while Job and his three friends continued debating the system of justice God had provided for the Universe. Job said, "Give me a break, I'm innocent. I've begged God to hear my story but he's shut me out. He has unfairly counted me among his enemies. He has…

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Added by Brad Snowder on November 4, 2012 at 2:15am — No Comments

The Good, The Bad, and the Fugly

Waiting for death. Stock photo. Job's Friends

Job 8:1 to 18:1



8:1 After Job's extensive tirade about the unjust nature of humanity's role in the battle between cosmic factions of good and evil, his number two friend had finally heard enough and entered the fray. He said "How long can you go on and on about what a good guy you are? If…

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Added by Brad Snowder on October 28, 2012 at 12:42pm — No Comments

The Game

A Universe unevenly divided by truth and lies. Testing Job

Job 1:1 to 6:4



1:1 Once upon a time there was a rich man in the land of Uz whose name was Job. He was indeed one righteous dude. He was very afraid of the Lord, which is wise, and also he hated evil. So that was essentially Job’s stand on the subject of human morality, fear and hate. He had a…

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Added by Brad Snowder on October 21, 2012 at 3:11am — No Comments

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