Some coffee had gotten on a man's ape. The man said, animal did you get on my
coffee?
No no, whistled the ape, the coffee got on me.
You're sure you didn t spill on my coffee? said the man.
Do I look like a liquid? peeped the ape.
Well you sure don t look human, said the man.
But that doesn't make me a fluid, twittered the ape.
Well I don t know what the hell you are, so just stop it, cried the man.
I was just sitting here reading the newspaper when you splashed the coffee all
over me, piped the ape.
I don't care if you are a liquid, you just better stop splashing on things, cried the
man.
Do I look fluid to you? Take a good look hooted the ape
If you don't stop I'll put you in a cup, screamed the man.
I'm not fluid, screeched the ape.
Stop it, stop it, screamed the man, you are frightening me.

Russell Edson