This made me laugh.
I'm still surprised that he's white!
LOL! OK, that one's funny.
Sounds like Bill Hicks to me!
** The gospels are fictional recruiting propagandaThe life of Jesus is like the life of Sherlock Holmes. They had no lives. They are fictional characters.Holmes and Jesus have also taken on a life of their own outside of canonic texts allegedly about them. Witness Holmesian fan fiction novel, ‘The 7% Solution’ — the title refers to Holmes’ addiction to injectable cocaine. Theology, starting with Paul (fl. 50-65 CE) and including the gospels is a messy mix of hellenistic fantasy and apologetic fan fiction.• Holmes’ London and Jesus’ Jerusalem are fictional. There never has been a 221B Baker Street. Dr Watson did not write ‘The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes’. Pilate was not governor of Judea -- that office did not exist until after Jesus' death. None of the four gospels was written by the people whose name each bears -- none ever met “Jesus” in the flesh.Jesus did not talk to Pilate using grandiloquent rhetoric according to John (written100 CE). Pilate was noted for cruelty and disdain for the people -- the Ecce Homo scene exculpates Pilate. Jesus was an apostate jew; local affairs held no interest for Rome. The penalty for Jesus’ religious crime was stoning.• After destruction of Jerusalem (70 CE) xians authored an anti-semitic conspiracy theory that jewish religious authorities and “the people” had accused Jesus of claiming to be “King of the Jews.” Xians side with Rome; jews become christ-killers.Jesus could no more die on a cross than Holmes could die from a heroin overdose.
How did Santa get into that picture?
That image makes Jesus look like he's doing stand up comedy (or sit-down comedy, I suppose.)
Jesus: How did Moses make his tea? Hebrews it!
Man in Crowd: Tell us a parable, Jesus!
Jesus: Well, I once did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
Woman in Crowd: Please heal me, Lord! I have an infection!
Jesus: Uh-ohhhh! When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble!
Jesus: Hey folks! How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!
Christian: "Jesus Saves!"
Jew: "Okay, but Moses invests."
Join Think Atheist
Welcome toThink Atheist
Get Started Nowor Sign In
Or sign in with:
Think Atheist is 100% member supported
All proceeds go to keeping Think Atheist online.
Sunday School April 13th 2014
Sunday School April 6th 2014
Sunday School Mar 30th 2014
Started by Unseen in Ethics & Morals. Last reply by Mike Donohoe 19 minutes ago.
Posted by Unseen on April 18, 2014 at 8:00pm
Added by Andy Hoke
Added by Emperor Milos
What would happen if you were to die in space?
We are in love with our Amazon
Gadget Nerd? Check out Giz Gad!
Into life hacks? Check out LabMinions.com
Advertise with ThinkAtheist.com
© 2014 Created by Dan.
Report an Issue |
Terms of Service
Please check your browser settings or contact your system administrator.