This made me laugh.
I'm still surprised that he's white!
LOL! OK, that one's funny.
Sounds like Bill Hicks to me!
** The gospels are fictional recruiting propagandaThe life of Jesus is like the life of Sherlock Holmes. They had no lives. They are fictional characters.Holmes and Jesus have also taken on a life of their own outside of canonic texts allegedly about them. Witness Holmesian fan fiction novel, ‘The 7% Solution’ — the title refers to Holmes’ addiction to injectable cocaine. Theology, starting with Paul (fl. 50-65 CE) and including the gospels is a messy mix of hellenistic fantasy and apologetic fan fiction.• Holmes’ London and Jesus’ Jerusalem are fictional. There never has been a 221B Baker Street. Dr Watson did not write ‘The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes’. Pilate was not governor of Judea -- that office did not exist until after Jesus' death. None of the four gospels was written by the people whose name each bears -- none ever met “Jesus” in the flesh.Jesus did not talk to Pilate using grandiloquent rhetoric according to John (written100 CE). Pilate was noted for cruelty and disdain for the people -- the Ecce Homo scene exculpates Pilate. Jesus was an apostate jew; local affairs held no interest for Rome. The penalty for Jesus’ religious crime was stoning.• After destruction of Jerusalem (70 CE) xians authored an anti-semitic conspiracy theory that jewish religious authorities and “the people” had accused Jesus of claiming to be “King of the Jews.” Xians side with Rome; jews become christ-killers.Jesus could no more die on a cross than Holmes could die from a heroin overdose.
How did Santa get into that picture?
That image makes Jesus look like he's doing stand up comedy (or sit-down comedy, I suppose.)
Jesus: How did Moses make his tea? Hebrews it!
Man in Crowd: Tell us a parable, Jesus!
Jesus: Well, I once did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
Woman in Crowd: Please heal me, Lord! I have an infection!
Jesus: Uh-ohhhh! When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble!
Jesus: Hey folks! How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!
Christian: "Jesus Saves!"
Jew: "Okay, but Moses invests."
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April 13, 2015 all day – Anywhere that one might find a glass of Johnnie Walker Black
Posted by Ed on December 15, 2014 at 9:33pm
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