Coming Out Godless: What's Your Story?


Coming Out Godless: What's Your Story?

We all come from different backgrounds & have different reasons for identifying ourselves as atheist or agnostic.

Whatever your story is, we'd like to hear it. Please share & encourage others who are considering "coming out"!

Members: 325
Latest Activity: Nov 6

How to tell your Religious Parents you are Atheist

Discussion Forum

Who else is hiding?

Started by Johnny Walker. Last reply by AlexOfCeaser Mar 14. 2 Replies

How I found my way!

Started by Emily Savannah. Last reply by _Robert_ Feb 25. 1 Reply

Coming out to my catholic parents

Started by Colleen. Last reply by Roberta Upton Cross Oct 29, 2014. 19 Replies

From Catholic to Mormon to Atheist

Started by Tom Smith Aug 20, 2014. 0 Replies

It was pretty much like this.

Started by Lewal. Last reply by Lewal Feb 26, 2013. 2 Replies

Being an 'out' Atheist at work.

Started by Zombie Atheist. Last reply by Jens Schwaiger Oct 10, 2012. 6 Replies

How committed are you to your atheism?

Started by Anachro1. Last reply by Ken Hughes Mar 1, 2012. 29 Replies

Your god contradicts all I live for.

Started by Sebastian Torren G.. Last reply by Suzanne Olson-Hyde Oct 12, 2011. 2 Replies

Here I Am

Started by Kat Humble. Last reply by Kat Humble Sep 20, 2011. 4 Replies

Another Brit - religion as a dangerous habit.

Started by Helen Pluckrose. Last reply by Steve Sep 4, 2011. 3 Replies

How I Lost My Faith in One Month's Time

Started by Kim. Last reply by Jack Frost May 30, 2011. 28 Replies

I DON'T recommend "coming out" if you're ...

Started by Sadly 'M' iCantSay. Last reply by Patrick Earley Apr 18, 2011. 49 Replies

Where do I go from here?

Started by Kevin Marks. Last reply by LovelyGirl Apr 10, 2011. 3 Replies

i don't think i'll be a christian much longer...

Started by S.S.. Last reply by MikeTheInfidel Mar 27, 2011. 15 Replies

From Bible-literalist Fundie to Outspoken Atheist

Started by MikeTheInfidel. Last reply by MikeTheInfidel Mar 27, 2011. 3 Replies

Comment Wall


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Comment by Elizabeth Peart on November 5, 2010 at 2:24pm
This is going to be long-winded but here goes. I come from a pretty typical family, and I was raised by my grandparents (mom worked away from home a lot) and so I was exposed to the choir music and hymns of my (believing) Methodist Welsh grandmother and my Anglican grandfather. I was given the usual kid's Bible when I was small, and so I just accepted the existence of God like anything else I was taught. When I started school, we sang hymns and went to the local church once a week for a service, and the headteacher (possibly one of the best examples of Christianity I have met, a truly wonderful man) taught R.E. i was surrounded also by pretty much all Christian families (with the exception of a single Muslim girl and a Jewish boy) which meant I was pretty much in the whole 'believe in God' thing up to my neck.
Things continued in the same vein, although my family have never regularly attended church or anything like that, until I was probably in university. There I signed up for the Christian Union and a church, and even became a worship band bassist, and did evangelism, gave Bible talks and played in the band.

I guess it all came unstuck due to things that happened to me during university, both to me personally but also to others. One of them was when I became seriously ill with a thing called polycystic ovarian syndrome. Prayer after prayer, time after time spent looking through the Bible for some sort of ánswer. I still ended up spending close to two years in and out of hospital getting treatment. Science, not prayer, is the reason I'm much healthier now, not prayer.

Then a supposed friend betrayed me. He promised me a lot of different things, I waited and waited until it was obvious he was never going to live out any of these promises to me and then called him out on it. He threatened violence, and even showed me violence on several occasions. It sent me to try and commit suicide twice, yet when I turned to my church I was expected to immediately forget this.

I also had in that time my grandfather go through serious illness, a friend of mine attempt suicide and some other stuff.

Another straw came with my historical study of the Bible. Going on YT and other places, as well as reading a lot of books, including most of those of Richard Dawkins, I began to notice a huge problem with the Bible: history doesn't agree with it. I noticed the flaws in the OT account of the Flood, of the foundation of Israel, of the story of Jesus and of the early Church, both from a historical point of view (I studied ancient history) but also a scientific, philosophical and moral point of view. Quite simply, I saw the Bible as junk.

I eventually quit the worship bands, stopped attending church (made easier by the fact I moved away after university graduation) and stopped attending Christian Union meetings. I still haven't declared myself openly atheist but some people in my circle of friends know about it.

I guess in some ways I was too respectful and unquestioning to stop myself searching for God when in reality I didn't need to look for anything.
Comment by Angela Gorman on September 2, 2010 at 7:22pm
The catalyst for me was starting work in NICU.. 24yrs ago. I looked at the babies and thought there can't be anyone who could influence this situation. If there was then I couldn't do my job and remain a believer. I realised there wasn't anyone and that what happened was just bad luck. That's how I did my job for so long. I couldn't understand how parents thanked god when babies were born healthy (indicating to them, god's responsibility for that healthy child) yet they were not allowed to blame god when things went wrong..sorry but god can't take the praise for success, but opt out when things go wrong!
Comment by Angela Gorman on September 2, 2010 at 7:16pm
Hi everyone.. I was brought up in a large strict RC family with a large extended family. Two 1st cousins were priests, another a nun. My sister is Head of RE at a very expensive catholic public boarding school near London. She can't comprehend how I survive without the church. My sister-in-law realised I wasn't joining in with the prayers or hymns at my cousin's funeral and told me she felt sorry for me! I told her not to waste her sympathy on me but to direct it towards someone who needed it! One of my 2nd cousins was drowned in the Asian Tsunami on 26th Dec 2004. He was on Kau Lak Beach with his girlfriend who also drowned. His body was identified at easter and Debbie in July! There was a service for him and I went. I sat and shook my head at the c..p I was hearing about why god wanted him at the age of 30yrs...
Comment by Brad White on May 23, 2010 at 6:38pm
Mr Good without God... I'd be happy to be your friend on FB. I'll accept you as you are, even if I don't get the same in return. (hope I do :-). If any of your Christian FB friends drop you when you come out, please direct them to my website so they can learn to LIVE their faith. Or before they drop you, encourage them to visit my site BEFORE they drop you. (
Comment by QM on March 21, 2010 at 12:26am
Joann, first of all thanks for your encouraging words and the compliment (yes, English is my second language. Where I come from decent education is a luxury which fortunately my folks were able to afford for us :-))

I have read your story and it is very inspiring and moving. I admire your strength and I know that it took an enormous amount of courage on your part to go through what you did. Thank you for sharing such an amazing story!

Very often I just feel sick and tired of being in the closet. I feel nauseated by my own silence at times, especially when I hear of suicide bombing in my country carried out by a zealot belonging to my ex-religion. I know that the only way to stop such barbaric acts is to educate people about how retarded this belief system is. I want to tell them that there are no 70 women waiting for them in heaven. That there is no 'all mighty master' smiling at them.

But I don't, out of fear. But sooner or later this silence has to be broken.

Thanks again for your warm welcome here. I know I have come to the right place with the right kind of people.. :-)
Comment by Joann Brady on March 19, 2010 at 11:50am
QM, I admire your strength and don't blame you a bit for staying "in the closet" I bet you wish you could immigrate to a more tolerant part of the world.
here in America I feel it is my personal mission to evcourage athiests to come out of the closet, because I firmly believe there are a LOT more of us than any one thinks. I am not even sure how to accomplish this.
By the way, I am guessing that English is a second language for you, and if so I would like to compliment your mastery of it. There are plenty of native speakers who do not have the mastery that you do.
So welcome to the group, I hope you are able to find comfort here. My story is further down the post ( I believe I posted it last June) if you care to read it.
Again..............welcome. You are among friends.
there used to be an Irish Pub in the neighborhood, and they had a sign behind the bar that is appropriate here. It said " There are no strangers here, Only friends we haven't met"
Comment by QM on March 19, 2010 at 1:41am
This is really a very interesting group! I would say that it's not surprising that there are lot of people out there who still haven't been able to come out as atheists but it is surely a lot more comforting to know that I am not the only one :-)

I am still a 'closet' atheist and I completely lost god & religion only a few years back, even though I had starting questioning things long before than that. I choose to remain in the 'closet' only because I really do not want to get killed by a mob of lunatics since I come from a country where any sort of 'blasphemy' is punishable by death and a person who quits the 'one true religion' is usually lynched by a mob of wild bearded men before he/she can be arrested, charged or taken to court. So may be I am a coward but that does keep me alive (not a bad bargain, i guess :-))

Anyways, it has been a long journey to the point where I now am free from religion and dogmas but the journey is still going on. When I now look back at all those years, I guess the most painful times were the ones when during my moment of doubt and pain I struggled to look back at god and his 'scripture' to find the answers. But in return got more questions. And those questions brought me 'redemption'.

My personal story of becoming godless is quite long and might seem mundane to everyone. Plus, I would like to remain a bit anonymous (for reasons made obvious above). I do not want to be labelled as a 'Blasphemer of Islam' at this point :-) Anyways, its great to be here and see such wonderful folks.
Comment by CJoe on March 17, 2010 at 9:31am
Mr Good, I've been tempted to do the same... but I really feel that coming out on FB is just social suicide and not the appropriate forum. Despite the fact that they splash their beliefs all over their own pages, it just seems like the wrong way to let them know. If it's really important to you, can you come out to them on a more personal level? Are you even close enough with all your friends on FB to let them in on something so personal (b/c this is PERSONAL and none of their business) and set yourself up to be judged by people who don't matter to you? I just think you should be careful. It's going to sting when your friend count drops sharply over night.
Comment by deepthought42 on March 17, 2010 at 1:04am
Mr. Good, let us know how that goes! I am (trying) to be careful with who on Facebook knows about my non-religious beliefs. Partly because I have religious friends/family/co-workers as my Friends, but also because I am job searching.
Comment by Mr Good Without God on March 15, 2010 at 10:22pm
I am considering "coming out" to my friends on facebook. This might seem silly, but it is a HUGE step for me. Most of them are right wing, super conservative, creationists, evangelicals. I am sure to get a lot of hate and anger thrown my way, but I am tired of hiding and just sitting back and being quiet. I am terrified to be honest. This will be my first real step in letting friends and family know.

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