Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Brittany on June 29, 2011 at 6:59pm

Same here. Guy starts talking to me, I have an internal panic attack and either start rambling, or don't know what to say.

Permalink Reply by Dylan Alexander Fick on June 29, 2011 at 7:17pm

That's sad :( I'm a big theater person and thrive in small groups. I only ever have that issue if I'm in a large noisy crowd. 

I hope you find a way around that issue!

Permalink Reply by Philip Jackson Armstrong on June 19, 2011 at 9:35am

My wife and I just grew in different directions. After a year of being single I can't imagine it being different, I am way too eccentric. I have an addiction to expanding my mind, as in learning, where everyone around me is looking for mind numbing stimulation. Television in particular. Except for the B monster movies on the weekend I spend every moment of my day learning things. Math, languages, linguistics, cosmology, philosophy, and on and on. Just try to start up a conversation on the great vowel shift or the partial dimensionality of fractals next time you meet someone new. It's probably obvious though, that I don't study anything involving communication skills. On top of that I'm psychologically androgynous, I meet women and next thing you know I'm just on of the girls. But most importantly I am the most happy and content person I've ever met, and even more so now that I'm single. I can't imagine a relationship that could improve on that.

Permalink Reply by KT on June 22, 2011 at 2:51pm

Well, there isn't really a great choice of people in my town to date. So, I haven't really tried to look for anyone else. Second, I'm really shy around new people, so they think that I'm snubbing them when I'm really not. Another thing, I'm still in High School, so relationships are the least of my worries. Lastly, I just got out of a bad relationship, so I'm too afraid to try again. But I'm happy being single most the time, so it's all good!

Permalink Reply by Dylan Alexander Fick on June 26, 2011 at 5:55pm

Applicable: 

* Still searching for your soul mate? 
* Have you lost in love and still tending your wounds? 
* Can't find an atheist mate?
* Don't know why I'm still single, I'm a great catch....

And now for the general story behind almost all of these:

I'm an Atheist that was in Tennessee for the last 8 years. (I am currently doing a summer internship teaching drama to children at a theater in New Jersey before I go to college in Florida this fall) The majority of girls as I was going through high school would either A) Dislike me just for the Atheism or B) Be afraid of what their family would think.

I've had five real girlfriends: Three times my Atheism was a factor in the friend/family intervention that ended those relationships.
One of those three times it was the ONLY reason for the end.
The other two times I have this "White Knight Complex" where I just have to help the damsel in distress.

Little known fact: Damsels in distress these days often develop personality disorders.

Like Borderline PD or Histrionic PD. Not so fun.  

Permalink Reply by Michael C. on June 27, 2011 at 9:30pm

I hate the bar scene

I am generally broke

Not many nonreligious ladies around here, I live in the deep South

And I spend most of my time trying to remedy the being broke bit

I have thought about joining a gym but the ones I have looked into really seem to be just arm of the local churches. Some of them go so far as to scroll bible verse on the billboard outside the place. So I am not going to give them my money to be furthering their own agendas. I am sure there are other reasons I am single I just don't want to be too self-analytical at the moment.

 

Permalink Reply by Brittany on June 29, 2011 at 7:06pm

I think 'can't find an atheist mate' and 'too shy' apply to my situation. 

I never initiate anything, and when someone else does I'm generally too nervous to say anything intelligent or witty. Mostly because I'm absolutely shocked that someone is showing interest, and my internal monologue becomes, "Don't screw this up or you'll be alone forever with your cats".

It's rare for me to find any atheists in my area as well. I'm not sure I can handle dating someone religious.

 

Permalink Reply by Eddie Smothers on July 4, 2011 at 9:26pm

Okay...where should I start..? I've never really had a lot of luck with relationships in my life. I've had a few one-night stands and a few failed relationships, but nothing that people would remotely call "love". I have no misconceptions about my failure at love; there are several different factors at work here. First and foremost, women don't generally find themselves physically attracted to fat guys. That's strike one; I've had a problem with my weight for most of my life, so my ever becoming thin is nothing more than wishful thinking. Secondly, I'm a nerd. I'm proud of being intelligent, and it just so happens that a large percentage of single women tend to gravitate towards physically attractive men with IQs equivalent to your average catfish. So, the fact that I can hold an intelligent conversation is deal-breaker number two. Thirdly, my bad luck tends to make me very shy in approaching women; you can't lose if you don't play has been my motto for a while now. I've tried the bar scene, and have even gotten "lucky" a few times; but I find those one-night stands to be incredibly empty and I prefer sex within a relationship so that it's not meaningless and that there's an emotional connection to be enjoyed there. I'd love to meet someone, but I don't work well with rejection. I've tried dating websites; went on one date and she was very nice, but it turned out that she just "wanted to be friends". Story of my life. I went to another site and started talking to another woman who has become one of my best friends, but I live four hundred miles from her, and I'm not terribly sure she'd ever be interested in me romantically. I'd love to be in a relationship with her, but she's got a lot going on in her life, and I don't think I'd fit in her life, at least not right now. I just hope that, one of these days, I could be able to find a woman whom I could fall in love with and who would fall in love with me, and I could finally experience the "love" that nearly everyone else has felt. Just once is all I ask for.

Permalink Reply by Joshua Neilson on July 6, 2011 at 3:49am

I am single because I am. I turn down advances all the time from people at work, people at the bar, the store etc etc etc.By all accounts I am a cute guy  I don't really know why I automatically turn them down. I have been hurt deeply in my past by some not so nice girls and the chance of going through that again is an experience that I would not choose to re live and I am pretty sure that will be the outcome of any future dating. I know I know...how will I ever find out if I don't start dating again? But the thing is after a while of being a decent person I get shat on over and over. I am begining to believe all the stories that I hear of treating girls like crap and they will stay with you. It certainly seems to be more true than not from my perception but I am not that type of person who finds it easy to treat another human being in such a degrading manner. So I am left with the only option I see fit in my life and that is to just stay single. I am happy and don't dwell on it but it's hard when society pushes the whole "have to have significant other to be fulfilled and content" to some extent that is true but it depends on the person you are with. I would much rather be alone than with someone who causes hurt. That's why I am single.

Permalink Reply by Sal The apostate on July 6, 2011 at 8:45pm

They all want to get married and sit home while I work my ass off to buy them stuff. (locally speaking)

Permalink Reply by Tim Jones on July 6, 2011 at 8:52pm

This is news?

Permalink Reply by Melody A. Rogers on July 30, 2011 at 4:58pm

Right, so.. this kind of self-advertising introduction isn't really my thing, mais.. c'est la vie.

My story is long and I'm not going to go into it, but I'll probably be single for a very long time mostly because of my standards. I'm picky, I guess, although I don't call it that. I have important rules I live by.

There is obviously a small pond to fish in when it comes to friends and relationships seeing as I only truly get along with atheists/agnostics. My best friend is a fundy, though, and I need someone to talk to who has as much of a brain as I do. I feel like my brain numbs every time I spend too long with someone religious.

Logic is important to me probably as much as morals are. So is creativity. I have a great love for old and beautiful things and much of my life revolves around that.

Anyway, not much to be said that can't already be seen on Facebook ;)

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