We get the same attitude here in the UK and it has always astonished me that the staff are not properly trained to accept whatever personal choices you make, especially the rational choices. Surely they're trained to give the bad news and ask about donating organs.
Here's one that may be controversial - what if the default practise was to harvest healthy donor parts and whatever else for medical training, research etc and burn the rest then ask if you want the ashes to perform whatever ritual you desire. This doesn't have to be as callous as it may sound and I'm pretty sure if we had all grown up in such a society it would make perfect sense...
ooh the shows starting