Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Skycomet the Fallen Angel on April 16, 2010 at 12:04pm

OMG! Story of my life!! I'm probably bi, but I can't say I can put a lid on that and call it "the end." And what is just as confusing is my apathetic attitude toward sex [I don't seem to have much of a "sex drive."] and that I am attracted to male bodies one moment, and female bodies the next, and then somewhat of a combination. I have thought for a while I was some kind of freak show. But I guess there is no such thing as a "Freak" in the GLBTQ community. ^_^

Permalink Reply by Kairan Nierde on July 6, 2011 at 9:24pm

Lol, I can SO relate!  When I was in high school I went from noticing guys to girls to guys and so on, but it never really at the same time.  The idea of bisexuality never connected, so I thought I was straight most of the time, but maby twice a month or every couple of months I went through this crisis of..."OMG, am I A LESBIAN!!??!!"  Which was sooo traumatic, since I'd been 'praying away the gay' since age six (fucking catholicism).  In college, I learned about bisexuality and felt so much relief!!!  Sometimes I still have that omg feeling of: "what if I am really a lesbian or am I straight--this bisexuality thing can't be real!" ...but then I realize it's just the biphobia and I chill.  Now, I'm attracted to people with genders all over the board.

Permalink Reply by Skycomet the Fallen Angel on May 10, 2010 at 1:27pm

BTW... the GLBTQI community is so diverse [from what I have heard] that it's not uncommon to not have a definite "label" for yourself. Just be yourself... and "to hell" with what anyone else thinks of it.

Permalink Reply by Lydia Hickman on March 24, 2013 at 7:54am

Have you ever explored asexuality? There are different forms of it, it's worth a look since this is how you feel. I have several friends that consider themselves asexual who also consider themselves atheist or agnostic.

Permalink Reply by Holly on April 16, 2010 at 5:56pm

:D

Permalink Reply by Venus Lovejam on April 28, 2010 at 11:04pm

I use to think I was straight, then I figured I loved women, then a man came along. If I'm lesbian, then the future will tell me; if I'm straight, well, I don't feel I really am straight. All I know is what my heart/privates want. If I like/love that person, it's not because of their gender.
Anyway, I'd love to be just a lesbian, but my heart says "Liar!". I almost wish I were straight, but my heart would say, "Liar!"

Permalink Reply by Kairan Nierde on July 6, 2011 at 9:26pm

I think about how much easier it would be to just be a lesbian a lot.  But it wouldn't be real...

Permalink Reply by sissybearsheba on May 10, 2010 at 5:13am

hi!!! im a bisexual, although i've never dated another woman, i have found them attractive.

Permalink Reply by Skycomet the Fallen Angel on May 10, 2010 at 1:26pm

^_^
I personally have trouble approaching a woman I'm attracted to... it's much harder than approaching a guy... ya' know... you never know if you're gonna creep a girl out.
So I've never dated another girl either.

Permalink Reply by Venus Lovejam on May 11, 2010 at 1:39pm

It also depends on your arena. Bars and nightclubs are bad for me, but if it's a friend of a friend, sometimes I have a better chance. Volunteering for your local glbtq club also helps you mingle. We're surrounded by straight people. Out in the everyday world, people of the opposite sex think you're fair game, unless you say so, but the most daring thing you can do is flirt with someone of the same sex "out there". Good luck in your pursuits!

Permalink Reply by Amy Fry on September 5, 2010 at 2:02am

I do believe I agree with most of your observations about the labels being fluid. I've also observed individuals who lean so far to one side or the other (homo/hetro) that I couldn't picture a different outcome for him/her. I don't necessarily agree with the concept of "knowing" at an early age. I did have an intense crush on my 4th grade teacher which I could take as a "sign" but in reality it was my first discovery of not fitting into societies norm.

Permalink Reply by Kairan Nierde on July 6, 2011 at 9:55pm

I had the same doubts about the term bisexual as you.  I can't stand the gender binary...I'm queer to gender.  I don't like saying omnisexual or pansexual because of the connotations of promiscuity, a stereotype which we already deal with enough already.  I stumbled upon a blog post talking about genders and the term bisexuality that informed me about something which allowed me to accept the term bisexual.

• The original psychological meaning of bisexual was not someone attracted to both genders but someone whose sexuality was both homosexual and heterosexual.  Thus the coinage of bi-sexual.
  

Consider that homo=same and hetero=different.

 

Different-sex attraction, or heterosexual, doesn't strictly mean opposite gender attraction.  So, bisexual is homosexual (attracted to one's own gender) and heterosexual (attracted to other genders).

 

This kind of blew my mind.  I know it's not going to come across well on a poster either.  ;-)

_____________________

 

As for the, I was x years old stories, I know they're hard to believe if you don't have that experience, but I was closeted and in denial from a young age until college.  In first grade I have a distinct memory of when family friends were visiting from across country that I had the epiphany that I liked women sexually.  The rarity of their visits corroborates the time.  I don't know how I knew the word lesbian, but I wrote "I am a lesbian" while hiding the words from my family and friends.  It is a very detailed memory and an experience I'm sure very few heterosexuals have.

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