Atheist Humor

A place for all things that might be funny to atheists or other non-theists.

Location: Funnybone Town
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Sometimes the humor takes care of itself.

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Comment by Stephen Sutton on December 30, 2012 at 4:55am

Comment by Alan C on December 19, 2012 at 7:10pm

I don't believe in astrology. I am a Sagittarius and we're very sceptical - Arthur C Clarke

Comment by James Cox on December 16, 2012 at 11:15pm

Right after 9/11, I walked into a local Fred Meyer. At the checkout, I over heard a conversation, 'Do you have patriotic show laces? Maybe look on row 6.'

Just before the person ahead of me left, I asked the question, 'Do you have anarcist show laces? Oh yes THEY MUST BE BLACK! Sorry to disturb you!'


Comment by RobertPiano on December 16, 2012 at 6:05pm

So the Captain of the firing squad asks the condemned man, "care for a last smoke?.."

The prisoner replies, "No thanks, I'm trying to quit".

Comment by Hope on November 30, 2012 at 11:32pm

Comment by James Cox on October 28, 2012 at 4:04am

Todays funny sign:

Context Walmart front entry doors: 'Shoe Laces have been recalled, sorry for the inconvenience'

I was half expecting to be stopped by Walmart Security. Happily I was wearing shoes with velcro...;p)

Comment by Suzanne Olson-Hyde on October 7, 2012 at 2:35am

Zombie Jesus - He died for your sins - then he came back for your brains.

Comment by Suzanne Olson-Hyde on October 7, 2012 at 2:31am

Hello, young man. I'd like to speak to your parents about making Jesus Christ their personal Lord and Savior.

OK - but first I'm going to need some proof that you're really Christian.

Um. OK...

Mark 16:17 says: These signs will accompany those who believe...

In my name, they will drive out Demons, they will speak in tongues...

They will pick up snakes with their hands, and when they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all.  Unfortunately, we don't have any Demons or snakes in the I'll just go get some Drano and a mug for you...

Er..How about I just do the "Speaking in Tongues' one?

If you  still have a tongue after this, we'll move on to phase two. - Russell's Teapot

Comment by Bo Fowler on September 23, 2012 at 9:43am

Comment by Gina Weston on August 19, 2012 at 7:07pm


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