A place for all things that might be funny to atheists or other non-theists.
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The Imam calls in his two wives, Fatima and Ameena and their goat Farook. He looks at them with a tear in his eye and says to them that it was not Allah's will that a man should have more that two wives.
"Oh right then," Fatima replied, "I'll pack my things. I guess Ameena can feed Farook."
A Brit, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden. "Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British." "Nonsense," the Frenchman disagrees. "They're naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they are French.""No clothes, no shelter," the Russian points out, "they have only an apple to eat, and they're being told this is paradise. They are Russian."
A blind man is sitting on a park bench. A rabbi sits down next to him. The rabbi is chomping on a piece of matzah. Taking pity on the blind man, he breaks off a piece and gives it to the blind man. Several minutes later, the blind man turns taps the rabbi on the shoulder and asks, "Who wrote this shit?"
Say, if'in ya digz joinin' me wee fan club, nobody has in ages, you can groove to moi's many hilarious parodies, vote in the jocular polls and just waste your time in general.
I don't know if you heard this one:
A farmer is showing his fields to the local pastor. They first go past a field filled with grain. "Look at the great harvest I grew here," the farmer says. The pastor nods and replies, "But with the help of God."
The farmer reluctantly agrees, "Fine, with the help of God."
Then they pass by a field of corn. "Look at all the great corn I grew here," the farmer proudly says. "With the help of God," the pastor immediately adds.
The farmers sighs. "Fine, with the help of God."
Then they pass by a third field, nothing is growing there, just a bit of weeds.
The pastor looks at the farmer. "That's not much to look at."
"Yeah," the farmer replies, "That he did all by himself."
Just received this via email:
A drunken man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway next to a priest. The man's tie was stained; his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, "Say, what causes arthritis?"
The priest replies, "My Son, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow man, sleeping around with prostitutes and lack of a bath." The drunk muttered in response and then returned to his paper. The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized.
"I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"
The drunk answered, "I don't have it, I was just reading here that the Pope does."
I always think of this whenever someone mentions Ray ComfortÂ :)
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December 23, 2013 from 7pm to 11:45pm – Spartanburg Event Center Cleveland Park
April 13, 2014 all day – Anywhere that one might find a glass of Johnnie Walker Black
Posted by Owen Hayes on December 10, 2013 at 12:20am
Added by Dan
Added by ɐuɐz ǝllǝıuɐp
Why do diesels produce more torque than petrol engines?
Why does looking at this picture hurt your eyes? (Giz Gad Warning: Don’t click if you get headaches easy)
How do pirates crack games without access to the source code?
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