A place for all things that might be funny to atheists or other non-theists.
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The Imam calls in his two wives, Fatima and Ameena and their goat Farook. He looks at them with a tear in his eye and says to them that it was not Allah's will that a man should have more that two wives.
"Oh right then," Fatima replied, "I'll pack my things. I guess Ameena can feed Farook."
A Brit, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden. "Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British." "Nonsense," the Frenchman disagrees. "They're naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they are French.""No clothes, no shelter," the Russian points out, "they have only an apple to eat, and they're being told this is paradise. They are Russian."
A blind man is sitting on a park bench. A rabbi sits down next to him. The rabbi is chomping on a piece of matzah. Taking pity on the blind man, he breaks off a piece and gives it to the blind man. Several minutes later, the blind man turns taps the rabbi on the shoulder and asks, "Who wrote this shit?"
Say, if'in ya digz joinin' me wee fan club, nobody has in ages, you can groove to moi's many hilarious parodies, vote in the jocular polls and just waste your time in general.
I don't know if you heard this one:
A farmer is showing his fields to the local pastor. They first go past a field filled with grain. "Look at the great harvest I grew here," the farmer says. The pastor nods and replies, "But with the help of God."
The farmer reluctantly agrees, "Fine, with the help of God."
Then they pass by a field of corn. "Look at all the great corn I grew here," the farmer proudly says. "With the help of God," the pastor immediately adds.
The farmers sighs. "Fine, with the help of God."
Then they pass by a third field, nothing is growing there, just a bit of weeds.
The pastor looks at the farmer. "That's not much to look at."
"Yeah," the farmer replies, "That he did all by himself."
Just received this via email:
A drunken man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway next to a priest. The man's tie was stained; his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, "Say, what causes arthritis?"
The priest replies, "My Son, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow man, sleeping around with prostitutes and lack of a bath." The drunk muttered in response and then returned to his paper. The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized.
"I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"
The drunk answered, "I don't have it, I was just reading here that the Pope does."
I always think of this whenever someone mentions Ray ComfortÂ :)
This is true but I guess here is as good a place as any to post it...
An Irish comedian posted to his Twitter account the other day that he was at his twins' Confirmation. The priest gave each and every child a Valentine's Day card.
Now I know it's obviously nothing romantic, but come on, given the relationship between Church and children in Ireland with all the sex scandals etc, that's just not a smart thing to do. At all.
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Posted by Misty: Baytheist Living! on May 22, 2013 at 6:56pm
June 29, 2013 to June 30, 2013 – Dublin, Ireland
October 19, 2013 from 9am to 9pm – University of Akron Student Union Theatre
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