I've been wanting to ask the men of TA this question for a while, but couldn't come up with the right wording to make it sound right....

So.....fuck it. I'm just going to ask you straight out.

How do men see women?

(Example) If you meet a new female co-worker, do you automatically categorize the woman as being like your wife, girlfriend, mistress, daughter, or some other female in your life? Do you then treat her accordingly?

The reason I'm asking is because I'm about to do something totally crazy. I'm entering a field where I may be working with ALL men. Less than 1% of women in this field. Why? Because I'm a crazy girl.....so. I need to know from a guy's perspective how to relate with them. I'm used to the "corporate world," and I can play that game. I'm also familiar with law enforcement, where things are a little rougher, but there was still plenty of women that I worked with. But I've never been the ONLY woman, (or one of the only women.) Maybe I'm freaking out over nothing....very possible. But, for what it's worth I thought it would be fun to discuss how men see women. And, any advice you guys have would be welcome. I'm fearful of men right now, but I know it's an irrational fear. I know that. But the opportunity I have in front of me could put me in the 6 figure range income-wise. I'm willing to do what it takes to overcome this. Any help/advice is welcome.

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There is a very heavy cultural influence on gender behavior, including how one is expected to appear. Why won't you acknowledge this kind of peer pressure? Where do your ideas of "manly man" and "masculine" come from?

As for giggle tests, don't women pay a hell of a lot more for appearances than men?

Pope B., quit your single explanation (peer pressure) before you get into trouble for ignoring other causes.

I guess the other causes just don't bother me so much. Bring it on!

Now I'm thinking maybe I was just missing your humor. Sorry, if that's the case.

PB, your reply had me wondering if you're a masochist. 

don't women pay a hell of a lot more for appearances than men?

Not necessarily.  Though men will spend less on their own bodies, they often are pressured to buy fancy stuff to impress the ladies.

RE Though men will spend less on their own bodies, they often are pressured to buy fancy stuff to impress the ladies.

Like what?
I wonder if men go through the same level of self-analyzation/reflection when they are going to work with all women...

Well, I spend a lot of my time working only with women in my current fundraising job. Three quarters of the time I'm the only man among five or six women. Our male supervisor's shift overlaps mine by only about an hour.

My answer is that, no we don't, though it might depend upon the field. Working among female nurses, I'm told, can be rough for a male nurse. Apparently female nurses see nursing as a woman's job and would like to keep it that way. That might cause the male nurse to do some pondering.

U, your mention above about the uses of sexuality by women hit the bullseye, as would a mention about the uses of money by men -- assuming the required attractiveness or wealth.

Your remark about female nurses seeing nursing as a woman's job and wanting to keep it that way brought me a couple of chuckle-worthy memories:

1. The woman I was dating who, as mealtime neared, chased me from her kitchen.

2. The elderly woman at a public library film viewing who (when the projectionist, a woman, delayed the viewing when the projector balked) told a woman friend, "That's what she gets for doing a man's job!"

Thanks.

This is an interesting question. I'm studying to be a Medical Assistant. 90% or more of the students in my classes are female. So far, I just want to be myself and don't care much about making impressions. But I'm not trying to attract anyone, unless they're more interested in what's inside the package. (I do see a lot more vanity in others than myself, male and female, which is the far end of the I-must-appear-like-blah-blah spectrum.)

I guess the difference being you probably don't get put on the defensive and are not harassed just for being a male.....(I'm guessing)......

But it doesn't work that way (from what I'm told) for women entering "male" professions.....like being an ironworker.

It's a man's world....still.

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