Recently, in chat, someone pointed out that there are fewer female than male Atheists.  That prompted a comment on sexual differentiation of intelligence.  I suggest that most women make the best choice for themselves and their children by opting for an 'outlook' that is not confrontational with family.

In other words, I feel that most women care less about whether or not there is a god than they do about whether or not they can maintain a harmonious relationship with their extended family.  In such a situation, what benefit would there be to adopting an Atheist stance - either psychologically or inter-personally?

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And how can one acquire atheism by going looking for it?

I am making that statement from being a former theist myself. I didn't go "looking to become an atheist," but I did start asking questions. When you start asking questions and looking for the answers, the result, (if you have any true reasoning skills whatsoever,) leads you to conclude that Atheism is the most rational, moral, humanistic, and mature approach to life that one can lead. Many people have been atheists their entire life. In that case these conclusions are never made because they have never been brainwashed to begin with.

I agree

Oh my gosh I could think of TONS!!! Ok...I'll speak in terms of "she" but I think it applies to men as well, although the way they experience their atheism may be different...I don't know... I'll list these in a list format.

1. She will be in control of her own emotions much more keenly and therefore be able to respond better to conflict.

2. She would not have to fight through the confusion that cognitive dissonance leaves behind.

3. She would be less (or simply NOT) co-dependent.

4. She would have the ability to problem solve with critical thinking skills rather than emotion and false hopes.

5. She would be able to smell bull shit a mile away and be able to protect herself and her family from many potential harms.

6. She would be able to be at peace with herself instead of trying to constantly BE something for everybody else.

7. She would know who she is and be able to be a stronger mother to her children.

8. Her kids would be better adjusted because they will know how to think critically as well.

9. Her sense of morality would be at its fullest, but she would be balance as to not sacrifice herself in the wrong ways.

10. She would be an equal partner with her husband, not a subservient helper.

11. She quite possibly may not even be married, may be single or divorced...and be at peace with it instead of feeling a cultural expectation to marry.

12. She would have the right to choose for herself what she does with her body and not be made to feel guilty for it.

13. She will feel more empowered at work because she will be able to make decisions based on deductive reasoning instead of flowery prayer and wishful thinking.

14. She would be able to stand on her own two feet instead of relying on others to provide for her.

15. She will have an accurate view of her worth and value both for herself and for her family.

16. She will be surrounded by good friends because she will attract level headed people.

17. She will know how to stick up for herself.

18. There will be no room for abuse in her life.

All of these things I believe are counter-intuitive to what Christianity teaches. I would venture to say the same about Islam and Judaism although the list does not stop here...these were just the things that come to mind...the things I've realizing for myself were clouded and distorted while I was a theist and are just now coming to light as healthy and normal. Christianity breeds an insane amount of co-dependency and for someone who has experienced any sort of abuse or trauma, the combination of the two makes for a very unhealthy relational style. Being a Woman and an Atheist lays the foundation for being able to lead a fulfilling and healthy whole life. Living in any religion just to appease the family is at its CORE a co-dependent behavior which leads to destruction no matter how noble you believe your intentions are or even how deeply buried in your own psyche your own doubts may be.

@Belle Rose

1.) How can she be emotionally influenced by a belief that she does not sincerely hold?

2.) How would she be tangled in cognitive dissonance in a belief to which she is not particularly attached?

3.) How does co-dependance even enter into this?

4.) How would critical thinking be affected?

You know, I'm just going to stop here because I think you've missed the entire point.  I'm not saying the average woman would pin her life on Christian theology - just that she could avoid a lot of conflict by not rejecting it.  Again, it's not about 'being right', it's about maintaining a social support network that she is far more likely to need than the average male.

@Heather: I guess I missed it then. I thought you're basically asking if a woman has a family that is religious in some way, and she is NOT (deep down), is it more beneficial to "go along with it" so that she's not rejected rather than voice her truely held beliefs (Atheism) and experience ostracization....My answer is an emphatic "No" for the above stated reasons....think about it

Again, it's not about 'being right', it's about maintaining a social support network that she is far more likely to need than the average male.........So you think its better to live in the midst of a lie to be a people pleaser? How is this NOT a codependent behavior? "I'll do what they want so they don't get mad or get their feelings hurt" thanks.

Obviously bearing children has never been an option for you.

I am a mother Heather. And I want more...I don't know what about my statements has made you think I am not a mother. I am an excellent mother. I have taken my son out of abusive environments from both my ex-husband and my OWN mother who is also an abuser. I have fought for him with everything I have and I will never EVER allow him to be brainwashed to appease the deluded emotions of others, under any circumstances. I will also not lead my life in a way that allows others to control me. It is control once you give up your power and make a decision based on what OTHER people want for YOU. It is not a healthy approach to life or a good example to set for your growing freethinkers. If you are rejected for taking a stance in what you KNOW is right, then the people who reject you are the losers. Not your kids. They would be better off not knowing such people, or having little contact as possible. It's right up there with child abuse as far as I'm concerned to train up a child to believe in fairy tales or to learn to comply with ignorance. I'm really REALLY surprised that you don't agree with that based on the strong Atheist Woman that I know you are Heather.

Yes women need a support network. But if family is so shallow as to reject their own flesh and blood for holding a different belief system, then is it a support network worth having if it causes you to keep quiet about your true feelings? I just think it's more important to be genuine and authentic to yourself. I think women are taught early on to care what everyone else thinks WAY too much.

Food in your child's belly is a lot more important than your 'true feelings'.

rice and beans are cheap and a healthy protein. You have to do what you have to do. Being a single mom and struggling to make ends meet is hard, but I will not accept hand outs from people who would want to control me or my kids. There are other ways to put food on the table rather than allow someone to manipulate you.

BTW: My checklist was addressing the answer to the "title" of your post..."The benefits of Atheism" everything else was addressing why it is negatively impacting to hold inside those "benefits" for the sake of keeping a social network. Does that help clear up my point of view a little?

...where everyone can see it!!! DAMN STRAIGHT!!!!


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