Roy Hammonds

This Will Be Hard To Believe But Satan Himself Came To Me
I Can Hear His Voice Right Now Even
PLEASE BELIEVE ME IM NOT KIDDING
AND PLEASE REPENT AND WORSHIP THE LORD JESUS CHRIST
HE IS TORMENTING ME RIGHT NOW FOR REAL
THE BIBLE IS THE TRUTH ITS NO LIE
PLEASE FOR YOUR LIFES SAKE LISTEN TO ME
NOTHINGS WORTH GOING TO HELL FOR
PLEASE BELIEVE ME I WISH I WAS DEAD THATS HOW MUCH TORMENT IM IN
PLEASE BELIEVE ME WORSHIP THE LORD JESUS AND HIS FATHER THE TRUE LIVING
GOD
IM WAS PUT IN TORMENT EVEN THO I SERVE THE LORD SO I COULD TELL YOU
WHAT REAL HELL IS LIKE SATAN HAS PUT ME THRU HELL (A PREVIEW OF WHAT IT
WOULD BE LIKE ) SEMIREAL
BELIEVE ME YOU DON'T WANT TO FEEL FIRE HOTTER THAN THE SUN AND EVERY
CREEPING THING ON EARTH ON
YOU AND THE DEVIL RIPPING YOUR GUTS OUT OVER AND OVER
AND I DID HEAR PEOPLE SCREAMING FOR THE MOTHER,THEIR
FATHER,BROTHERS,SISTERS,e.t.c
BUT YOU ARE ALONE AND ONCE YOUR THEIR GOD WILL NOT HEAR YOU ANYMORE
YOUR BY YOURSELF
YOU ARE ALONE NOBODY WILL HELP YOU
SATAN DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOU ALL HE WANTS IS TO DRAG YOU TO HELL WITH
HIM
PLEASE DO NOT LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU
JESUS CHRIST IS THE ONLY WAY TO ESCAPE HELL
IM NOT KIDDING PLEASE MY BROTHERS AND SISTERS
THE LORD JESUS LOVES YOU AND I LOVE YOU

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One night I was awakened from a deep sleep by Elvis, dressed in his white jump suit with the rhinestones. He told me he had come to take me to heaven and show me the error of my ways. That, that was what he did now, try to gather lost souls back into the fold. And with that he wisked me off to heaven. Heaven was a nice enough place, very pleasant and all, but when he brought me back home, I thanked him, got back into bed, rolled over and went back to sleep. When I woke up in the morning I thought, gee, that seemed so real! But as wonderful as Heaven seemed, I just couldn't make myself believe.
WOW! (and not the game)
I was expecting to find at the bottom that I would have to forward that to 10 people or else I would go to hell.
wait... so he serves the lord and he has been put in torment anyway? that's not a very compelling argument to want to worship jesus alongside him, even if what he's saying was easy to believe.
what does he think he's the next Job?
Damn - if anything I feel sorry for this dude. He is torturing himself. Man I hope the people who made him like this realize what they have done. Hope he gets himself out of this rut.
I empathize with this man. This one time I couldn't figure out how to turn my caps lock off it was an equally terrifying experience.

...PLEASE BELIEVE ME!
unfortunately no amount of pleading will make jesus, hell or satan real.
OH SWEET RAPTOR JESUS!
HE'S RIGHT!!!
WE MUST REPENT.
I SEE NOW THE ERROR OF MY WAYS .
THANK YOU ROYMAMMONDS!
THANK YOU YOU SWEET PRINCE
Dude, seriously, you're full of shit! Go away!
"THE LORD JESUS LOVES YOU AND I LOVE YOU"

Yes but will you both respect me in the morning :)
At least his approach was sort of creative. Idiotic sure, but I'd stick it on the refrigerator just to show him how proud I was of him and to encourage him to do better next time.

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