Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Simon Paynton on August 7, 2012 at 6:40pm

You can be OK and comfortable, strong and secure, have all your material needs taken care of, but that isn't the same as being happy. 

In fact you need to be OK in order to make others happy, and you need to be OK so that you're not depriving yourself of resources when you help others. 

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Permalink Reply by Unseen on August 7, 2012 at 7:04pm

You say "In fact," but in fact I think that's your opinion. I think people often make themselves unhappy while making others happy.

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Permalink Reply by Simon Paynton on August 7, 2012 at 7:21pm

Sorry, just a turn of phrase. 

"I think people often make themselves unhappy while making others happy."

This is true. 

It's also possible for someone who is already unhappy, to cause someone else's happiness. 

However, I contend that that the unhappy person will be a little bit happier afterwards. 

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Permalink Reply by archaeopteryx on August 15, 2012 at 12:42pm

@Unseen - RE: "people often make themselves unhappy while making others happy" - I certainly can't imagine you arrived at this though personal experience --

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Permalink Reply by Unseen on August 7, 2012 at 10:19pm

I just realized that by turning your assertion around, it would follow that other people are happy only when I am happy, and I can tell you for sure that that is NOT TRUE.

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Permalink Reply by Simon Paynton on August 8, 2012 at 3:54am

But they can always become happy through other means - they don't need to have been made happy by you and me. 

If I'm trying to influence someone else's happiness, if it's not necessary for me to be happy, at least it is necessary for me to know what I'm doing. 

It is also a sad truth that it gives many people pleasure when they see that somebody else is unhappy. 

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Permalink Reply by Pope OoO (Out of Order) on August 16, 2012 at 4:16pm

many people pleasure when they see that somebody else is unhappy

Schadenfreude

 ⁱ/ˈʃɑːdənfrɔɪdə/ (German: [ˈʃaːdənˌfʁɔʏdə]) is pleasure derived from the misfortunes of others.^[1] This German word is used as a loanword in English and some other languages, and has been calqued in Danish and Norwegian as skadefryd and in Swedish asskadeglädje and Finnish as vahingonilo.

(And I hope everyone clicks on every link. Or hates that I left out the word "gives". Hahahahahahahahahaha! Hahahahahahahahahaha! Hahahahahahahahahaha! Hahahahahahahahahaha!)

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Permalink Reply by archaeopteryx on August 15, 2012 at 12:45pm

@Unseen - Recalling your "sackful of kittens and a hammer," I think I can safely assume that that's an accurate statement.

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Permalink Reply by Unseen on August 15, 2012 at 1:16pm

Did I say that? I thought I had made reference to a box full of puppies and a chainsaw.

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Permalink Reply by Pope OoO (Out of Order) on August 16, 2012 at 3:43pm

I'd suggest this discussion should be more analog, and less true/false binary. There's even analog wrt a box of puppies and a chainsaw. Like, I'd draw my line at never having fuel in (or an extension cord for) the chainsaw. Just the noise would cause trauma. Unless it were some future, super-quiet chainsaw.

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Permalink Reply by Simon Paynton on August 17, 2012 at 1:39pm

"more analog, and less true/false binary"

Agreed.  Like real life, in fact.  50 shades of grey. 

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Permalink Reply by Doug Reardon on August 7, 2012 at 11:39pm

If my partner isn't happy, I'm not happy.

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