Often you see people in a graveyard talking to departed loved ones.  Being an Atheist, I do not believe in any form of life after death.  I don't believe that we have souls that go on living after our body dies.  This being said, do you ever find yourself speaking to the air in a graveyard?

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No, I don't go to graveyards and I don't talk to the death. But when I was a catholic I did lit candles next to their pictures, make prayers with a rosary, light incense, pray to their saint or virgin depending on the day they were born, taking floweres to the grave and lot of weird things I have lost forgotten. In my case this only made things worse.. I could only accept death and embrace it after I became an Atheist.

Someone who needs to talk to a death person is someone who's scared of death, and that's the most ridiculous fear, because you will have to face it, sooner or later.

Have you ever lost anyone, Gabriela?  

Talking to someone, even after they're gone, is not a weakness.  It is not for people who are "scared of death".  For some people it's a natural part of the grieving process.

For example, my friend just passed away, leaving his two little girls without a father.  The oldest one at 7 years old, spends hours talking to her father at his grave.  It's an outlet for her.

I find your statement incredibly insensitive to people who are grieving. 

1st A rule of having an honest debate or conversation is not adding words that were never said. I never said the word WEAK, I said the word SCARED. If you consider FEAR a WEAKNESS that's you not me. I consider fear a part of human nature specially to the unknown. Fear of not knowing what will happen next to the departed. Fear of facing life without seeing them again.

This is not weakness. I don't know if you hav ever read eastern philosophy. I think it would light a little bit the way for you, into seeing death as a natural process of a living organism.

Death is a part of life, if you cant embrace it, you will suffer and grief a lot for the rest of your days.

PS: I lost someone. That's not something you just get over it by talking in your head with them. Is something you learn to live with for life.

But part of learning to live with it may be talking to them.

God is dead, you can also talk to him.

Death shouldn't be seen from the Hollywood, pseudo psychological point of view, where you are a "ghost whisperer" in order to move on. When you begin seeing death from the philosophical perspective, you will not need monologues, in fact you won't feel sad about their death you will rejoice about their life. That's the whole point.

Just as when you changed your point of view about sky daddy you stopped praying, and became an Atheist, I'm guessing you are able to have a normal life.

But in order to gain acceptance you must stop seeing the western standard of death, that's not constructed by science or common sense but by populist tv shows with some soap opera sort of morale and dark age myths.

Who are you to dictate how people gain acceptance?  Everyone goes through the grieving process differently.

You are entitled to your opinion, but you're dictating how other people should feel.  That's not fair.  No one made you an absolute authority on how people should handle death.

I understand your bitterness because your friend died. I'm not dictating how you should feel. I don't even know you. I'm sorry for your lost. When you let go of your sorrow and come in terms to it you will be ready for learning a new way of seeing things until then if you feel good talking with them in your head, as a religious person feels good on the day to day life praying, then be free, I'm not saying I have or want authority over you grieve. I didn't kill that guy and I wish life wasn't so unfair. But that's the way it goes.

I'm not speaking of myself.  Don't presume to tell me that I'm bitter.  You don't know how I feel, you don't even know me, as you've said, and that's my point.

My point, in case you're missing is, is that you don't get to decide that people are automatically "afraid of death" if they're talking to loved ones after they die.  That's your opinion, but it is certainly not the only correct way of looking at the situation.

I suggest that you take a look at Kubler-Ross, for a start, in understanding how people deal with loss and grief.

Gotcha. Im sorry if I offended you. You may take the apologize or not. Lets not make this something personal ;)

For what it's worth, Kubler-Ross' opinions have suffered some significant scrutiny over the past few years- especially by those going through the process of dying and those grieving after they have died.

This is just a start- I recently looked for literature for my aunt as my uncle had colon cancer and recently died- I found a fair amount of critisicm of Kubler-Ross' ideas and found many alternative ways of thinking about "death and dying."



Who are any of us to dictate what people believe... oh, that's right. We're people of higher reasoning. That's why we're justified in telling people their gods are silly, isn't it?

You're wildly off the mark, friend.


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