Satanist Temple "Converts" Fred Phelps Jr.'s Mother to Lesbianism in Gravesite Pink Mass

I reckon that's the strangest headline I've come across in a long time. Here's the scoop:

When the WBC announced they would be protesting at the funerals of Boston Marathon bombing victims, it was apparently the last straw for a group of Satanists based in New York. The Satanists were inspired to celebrate a "Pink Mass" and they prepared to counter-protest against the WBC. But the WBC were a no-show in Boston. (Small mercies) Satanic Temple representative Lucien Greaves says that 'the WBC's subsequent announcement that the WBC were present at the funerals "in spirit"' prompted the Satanists to "meet the WBC "in spirit"" at the Mississippi grave of Catherine Idalette Johnston. That's dear Freddie's mother. Just in case the WBC weren't getting the message, the Satanists also hacked the WBC'c website to declare their Pink Mass ritual had made Mrs. Johnston "gay in the afterlife." The Pink Mass ritual was performed twice so that a both lesbian and a gay couple could each make out on top of Mrs. Johnston's grave. Guess the conversion wouldn't stick without that extra spit swapping.

In response, the WBC assures everyone they still hate gays. They plan to descend upon the funeral of Glee star Cory Monteith, who overdosed last Sunday in a Vancouver hotel room. Monteith died at 31 and was a respected ally of the LGBT community.

Yes. That all happened.

It is the humble opinion of this atheist that both the Satanists and the WBC could benefit from a bit of reflection on one of that Jesus fellow's philosophies: love thy neighbor. The moral of the story may be that vile behavior begets vile behavior begets vile behavior. Mama always said you can't wash blood out with blood and I expect the same holds true for cleaning up shit stains. What say ye, Thinking Atheists?

***Details and quotes are harvested from a Gawker article. I can't seem to copy and paste today, or I'd hook you up with the link.

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Permalink Reply by H3xx on July 20, 2013 at 11:39am

Has there ever been definitive proof of satanist temples? I mean ones that are filled with adults, not rebellious teens listening to death metal and and drinking Hawaiian Punch claiming it's blood? Because the only people I've even ever heard talk about these things were overly religious old women gossiping, and baptist preachers intent on frightening said old women.

I imagine that an Anon sect decided to screw with Fred Phelps and he took it seriously. I am a strong advocate of nonviolence, but I really wish someone would shoot that old bastard, so that particular section of the southern grapevine can begin to heal. It's been poisoned long enough.

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Permalink Reply by Strega on July 20, 2013 at 12:07pm

Apparently there was this one but it closed in 2012. it looks as if it was an e-temple :)

Then we have this one, also an e-temple I think.

There's a Church of Satan website - why on earth do Satanists have to use so much black on their sites - so 'conventional' it's almost corny. Anyway, apparently this lot is in New York - maybe we should get one of our NY members to go take a photo!

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Permalink Reply by Kairan Nierde on July 20, 2013 at 7:39pm

LOL. There's a lot of black on this website too. : D

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Permalink Reply by Strega on July 21, 2013 at 7:09pm

Gunmetal grey, I think is the swish name for it :)

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Permalink Reply by Unseen on July 23, 2013 at 12:54pm

Well, it's black enough for use on a Satanist site.

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Permalink Reply by Kairan Nierde on July 24, 2013 at 12:56am

Meh, gunmetal grey or black...looks the same on my device. I don't like bright screens.

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Permalink Reply by H3xx on July 21, 2013 at 9:46pm

I found their 11 rules, I guess their version of the 10 commandments.

The Eleven Satanic Rules of the Earth

1. Do not give opinions or advice unless you are asked.

2. Do not tell your troubles to others unless you are sure they want to hear them.

3. When in another’s lair, show him respect or else do not go there.

4. If a guest in your lair annoys you, treat him cruelly and without mercy.

5. Do not make sexual advances unless you are given the mating signal.

6. Do not take that which does not belong to you unless it is a burden to the other person and he cries out to be relieved.

7. Acknowledge the power of magic if you have employed it successfully to obtain your desires. If you deny the power of magic after having called upon it with success, you will lose all you have obtained.

8. Do not complain about anything to which you need not subject yourself.

9. Do not harm little children.

10. Do not kill non-human animals unless you are attacked or for your food.

11. When walking in open territory, bother no one. If someone bothers you, ask him to stop. If he does not stop, destroy him.

---------------------------------

My former religious overlords at my parent's church described satanist as fundamentally evil in all ways. Judging by this list however, they're just mildly anti-heroic.

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Permalink Reply by archaeopteryx on July 20, 2013 at 8:03pm

Satanists give atheists a bad name.

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Permalink Reply by Kairan Nierde on July 21, 2013 at 10:59pm

Actually, I think it's the people who can't tell the two apart doing that.

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Permalink Reply by archaeopteryx on July 21, 2013 at 11:03pm

Actually, that's probably the more accurate statement.

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Permalink Reply by Reg The Fronkey Farmer on July 21, 2013 at 3:09pm

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Permalink Reply by _Robert_ on July 22, 2013 at 7:58pm

I want that hat !!!!

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