Religion and Personal Relationships

So two of my ex-girlfriends and my current girlfriend are all religious and have one point or another sat me down on a couch and asked me, "You don't belive in Jesus do you." In my head Im resisting the urge to laugh and say, "no fucking way," but out of respect i restrained myself and explained calmly that i am atheist and no i do not believe in Jesus. Well i hope you can all see where this discussion went. To the point however i would like to ask you guys if any of you have had this predicament and how did you deal with it. I do love my girlfriend very much but she is highly religious and has no intention of allowing me to stay "ignorant of her lord and savior." What do mentlegen?

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Permalink Reply by Stephen on September 19, 2011 at 9:21pm

Should probably address your situation on this as well and not just ramble...

I agree with most others who've posted: if problems persist now, it's likely only going to get worse as time goes on. If you two can't keep your relationship separate from your conflicting viewpoints, I wouldn't pursue the ordeal, personally. The time and effort is better spent on someone who doesn't see atheism as an immediate roadblock. Loving someone for who they are unfortunately entails one's belief system (or lack of), and it simply isn't conducive to a healthy relationship to have that conflict (especially if it's repressed).

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Permalink Reply by T A A on September 19, 2011 at 9:41pm

What happened to you was perfect in that odd sense, better sooner than later. Sincerely, I think "feelings" are the absolutely wrong reason to be with someone if they are in contradiction with the basic facts of your personalities. "Feelings" should build on good foundations of mutual understanding and agreement on a whole bunch of fundamentals, and values. People who get married on the basis of "feelings" are surely the reason our divorce rates are so high. "Feelings" change, always have, always will. "Feelings" are unreliable, especially as judges of character.

Hey, that's a great function of college, learning :)

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Permalink Reply by Tom Lockhart on September 19, 2011 at 10:49pm

You should canvass religious beliefs before the relationship develops to the point you call her your girlfriend. If it important enough you would do it early. I did.