I wrote this recently. It describes what being owned by a cat is like vs. owning a dog.

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DOGS AND CATS
(FOR THE NEW CAT OWNER WITH DOG EXPERIENCE)
 
You're standing on your feet working (e.g., preparing food)
DOG: stays at your feet, studiously avoiding your feet as you move around.
CAT: either lays down daring you to step on him (he's training you to be careful around him), OR insists on jumping up onto the counter or table to interfere with your activities.
 
You're laying down sleeping or napping
DOG: jumps up on the bed, being careful to jump over you if necessary so as not to bother you.
CAT: jumps up on the bed, being careful to walk ON you with all four feet.
 
You are sleeping in bed for the night
DOG: lets you sleep in.
CAT: starts trying to wake you up at 4:30 a.m. by walking on you or booping your face or pulling your covers off.
 
Going outside (outdoor cats only)
DOG: brings you his leash because it's time go for a walk.
CAT: taps at the door while looking at you to say "Let me out!" but immediately wants to come back inside.
 
Training
DOG: will try hard to do what you want just to please you and will repeat trained actions for just a pat on the head or a kind word.
CAT: might do what you want if you offer a treat, will train you to give it treats whenever you want him to do anything.

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Booping?

"Booping" may be an Americanism, but it's for real. It's a tap, usually on the face or nose.

Hitchens gave a good explanation of the differences:

“Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they will think you are god. Whereas owners of cats are compelled to realize that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they draw the conclusion that they are gods.”

I adopted a stray black cat about 2 years ago. A black cat moved into my house unannounced 2 years ago. I recently gave it a name: “YOU’RE ONE OF THEM”. It still pays no heed to me but the neighbors get freaked out when I start calling it to come in!!

I suspect a few of us remember this Canadian cartoon?

The cartoon was funny.

I agree in generall, although my dogs hang out when Im in the kitchen, snooping and generally getting in the way.  If I leave pizza on the counter, somehow it jumps off.  I love them anyway.

Plus, my doggies don't tell me when they need to go out, and in their old age if I don't send them out every 4 hours, they pee on the floor.  They are ancient in dog years, so I excuse them for that sin.

One dog stays by my side constantly.  The other lives in his own world.

When I had a cat, she was expert at getting out, and in the end we let her.  I installed cat doors so she could come and go as she pleased.  At some great old age, unknown because she started our interactions as a stray, she disappeared.  I also had a cat tear through a window screen and disappear.

My position is this: Let a cat be a cat. I don't trim her claws. She has plenty of opportunities to sharpen her claws between her cat tower which has both carpeting and sisal on it. A board covered with sisal. Plus, I have cheap throw rugs and low-pile carpeting she's welcome to use, though she mostly uses the cat tower and the sisal board.

She's not one of those passive cats. She knows what she likes and doesn't and to subjrct her to something she doesn't, like trimming her claws or putting her on her back, will result in a serious scratching or even a bite.

The cat training the owner part is so true. I have two cats.  Sometimes when Weasley meows, I go to the treat bag, get some treats, and begin tossing them to him like those alien chicks with the collars in that Star Trek episode.  If I give him too many he immediately barfs them up on the lightest-colored carpet he can find.

Mulan is another story.  I've had her for about a month.  She was in shelters for 1.5 of her 2.5 years of life. She has been training me where to not touch her, how to pet her, and how to tolerate having my thighs kneaded with her Edward Scissorhands paws. She has not allowed me to trim her claws, but I have begun a campaign of touching her paws with the eventual goal of being able to trim them some time before she kills me. 

LOL

A dog sees you as the leader of his pack, of which you are both members.  A dog will kill and/or die to protect you and your family.

A cat sees you as a host, the way a parasite views its host.  The second you cease to be a food source, the cat will drop you the way an engorged tick drops from its last meal.

:D

You have it exactly wrong. Cats are with us by invitation only. They don't trick us into serving them. Dogs have studied us to the extent of even mimicking our facial expressions in order to get into our heads! Science is starting to recognize them as a sort of high order parasite.

Dogs belong to that select group of con artists at the very top of the profession, the ones who pick our pockets clean and leave us smiling about it. Dogs take from the rich, they take from the poor, and they keep it all. They lie on top of the air-conditioning vent in the summer; they curl up by the fireplace in the winter; they commit outrages against our property too varied and unspeakable to name. They decide when we may go to bed at night and when we must rise in the morning, where we may go on vacation and for how long, whom we may invite over to dinner, and how we should decorate our living rooms. They steal the very bread from our plates (I'm thinking here of a collie I used to have whose specialty actually was toast). If we had roommates who behaved like this, we'd be calling a lawyer, or the police.

Biologists, if they weren't victims of the same blindness that afflicts us all, wouldn't hesitate to classify dogs as social parasites. This is the class of manipulative creatures exemplified by the cuckoo, which lays its eggs in the nest of some poor unsuspecting dupe of a bird of another species. The befuddled parents see a big mouth crying out for food and stuff it full of worms at the expense of their own offspring. Every time they turn their backs, the cuckoo hatchling shoves another of their own flesh and blood overboard. The parents never seem to notice. (source)

Wrong.

Cat's are the parasites, as they DO NOTHING IN RETURN.

Dogs do herding, fetch slippers or birds, guard the house, warn diabetics of low blood sugar or insulin overdoses, lead the blind, help find disaster victims and criminals, help find hidden drugs or explosives, etc.

Cats do NOTHING.

:D

Your both wrong Lil'Shit is living up to his name (sorta), may have to change his name to PilesO'Shit.  I'm hauling 4lbs of litter-box trappings to the trash everyday.

On a better note.

This is Peanut.

My Grand-Daughter...ain't she a Cutie? :)

The duck outfit was meant for her brother

Butta

Arriving soon. :)

I use one 40 lb box of litter a month for my litte kitty scooping every other day, which she seems very happy with. Never once in four years has she gone outside her litter box. I start off with about 2-2.5" of litter, scoop every other day like I said, and maybe every third scooping replace lost litter. 40 lb gets me through the month very easily. WTF are you doing? LOL

You're making it much harder than it has to be, sounds like.

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