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Permalink Reply by Unseen on November 13, 2012 at 3:42pm

If my father, on his death bed asks me to pray, I will make the appearance of praying. Why would I want to leave the man I love the most with disappointment in his last moments? There are times to be right and times to be generous and good.

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Permalink Reply by Kris Feenstra on November 13, 2012 at 3:52pm

It's a matter of perspective. My father's expectation is that I am true to myself and not restricted to his beliefs. That's how my family is. It's an insult to the way we live to betray that. If the situation was reversed, and I was dying and he wanted to pray, the same would hold true. It would pain me less that he wanted to pray than it would that he would feel the need to conceal his beliefs and convictions to appease me. Really, in this inverse scenario, I'm the one who gets off easy. I'll be dead and done soon; he's gotta live with the aftermath.

My father doesn't pray or believe in God, mind you, but we could find analogues, I'm sure.

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Permalink Reply by Kris Feenstra on November 13, 2012 at 3:57pm

This falls under the assumption that he is of sober mind at the time.

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Permalink Reply by Unseen on November 13, 2012 at 6:08pm

I don't think there's a real analog to a God who will be waiting to reward you after you pass on.

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Permalink Reply by Kris Feenstra on November 13, 2012 at 6:16pm

I meant an analogue to acts of placation.

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Permalink Reply by archaeopteryx on November 13, 2012 at 3:43pm

Remember the line from the Atheist Christmas Carol I posted? "It's better to be loved than to make a point."

What kind of Humanist would one be, if they denied their own father a dying wish? If  it made you feel any better, I suppose you could always cross your fingers behind your back.

I'm going to be needing one of those some day, and it's going to be for a cheeseburger.

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Permalink Reply by Marc on November 13, 2012 at 4:16pm

The kind thing would be to appear to pray, and lie to him and tell him you did. If he believes people are praying for him, it might help him more than actual prayer does.

Wasn't there a study that implied people that were told people were praying for them (when they weren't) had better outcomes then people that were actually prayed for but never told?

If there is power in prayer that is pretty much the beginning and the end of it, self-fulfillachondria?

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Permalink Reply by archaeopteryx on November 13, 2012 at 6:57pm

I'm not sure about the study personally, but there was an episode of "House" in which someone said there was, and we all know that if it's on TV, it has to be true.

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Permalink Reply by Wesley on November 13, 2012 at 8:03pm

actually there was a study that showed that people who knew people were praying for them did worse...    http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2006/04/060403133554.htm

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Permalink Reply by Marc on November 13, 2012 at 9:48pm

That's OK. I made up self-fulfillachondria and it sounded pretty good, no?

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Permalink Reply by archaeopteryx on November 13, 2012 at 7:22pm

I would ask to borrow it --

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Permalink Reply by James Cox on November 14, 2012 at 1:00am

Once I used a local minister as a reference. It came to my attention that every time someone called for a reference, the minister used it as an opportunity for soul saving, putting me in a rather bad light. Sadly, I see this as yet one more brick in the wall....;p)...

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