I'm a newish atheist. Two years, I guess. My husband knows, my kids do not. My friends suspect. I'm trying to be careful how and when I come out. So, I have no one IRL to talk to. I've just started reading here after having the site recommended to me by an atheist blogger.
My husband is amazingly cool about it. He lost his faith a few years ago but I think it was out of anger because he's back at it again. We had an interesting conversation the other night. He said that he knows there can't be a heaven because it makes no sense whatsoever, yet he needs there to be so he believes. He's an otherwise brilliant person and I think he is just having trouble letting go of his upbringing.
I, on the other hand, was a rebel from the word 'go'. In Catholic high school, I told the teacher of our religion class (a priest) that papal infallibility was bull. I was a shy kid but on matters of religion, I called it like I saw it. I even tried to fail my confirmation test by refusing to memorize the rote prayers.
I left the Catholic church eventually and tried different flavors of Protestantism, mostly in the south. So... scary! I nearly got killed by the laser eyes of judgment at church many years later when the pastor said they were going to show a video on the evils of Harry Potter and I started angrily whispering to my husband how they can't judge it if they'd never even read it. He was mortified. Not because he disagreed with me but because I couldn't be quiet about it. So, yeah, I have trouble not speaking the truth out loud and I think my friends are on to me and I may be needing to look for new ones soon. I'm 46 and getting a little old for starting over. But here goes.
So happy to be here. ^_^
Just realized I needed an explanation for the subject line. One of my friends appears to have figured me out and I am not sure if she will be quiet about. So things could get interesting. :)
Thanks, Ed. It's getting might close in here. I think the next few months are going to be an interesting time for me. Smiling comes much more easily for me now that I am not drowning in superstition. I find it interesting that theists think that atheists are miserable. I cannot think of a time in my life when I have been more content and more comfortable in my own skin. I intend to be a friendly atheist too. That should confuse them. :)
History tells us that when atheists come out, they can often need someone close who understands and who can help and support them as they go through the process. Dealing with friends and family who (wrongly) feel disappointed, let down and abandoned is very hard: it's the right thing to do for most of us - but...it is likely to be more difficult than you expected perhaps. And having a friend lined up who really understands, can be critical.
I didn't - but I wish I had!
Thanks, Jim. I am working on that.
I've been a lot more content and comfortable too since I let go of my religion. I think it does throw them for a loop when you calmly, casually state that you're an atheist and carry on like you still deserve the same amount of respect. Smiling is great, but sometimes I have to stop from smirking or chuckling, so I try to keep a straight face. :-) Good luck.
Excellent way to do it, Kiaran. And it seems to be working. More on that later.
Hello Becky, first off welcome to TA! It can be scary coming out, especially when family is involved. I was raised for the first 17ish years of my life as a hard core fanatical "non-denominational" Christian in the south, and when I first started to figure things out I also kept a lot of my opinions to myself. But as time went on I simply (although not so simply) stopped caring what others thought and now I’m very open and honest about how I feel, but it took a few years. It does help having a spouse that is on the same page to give you courage, It sounds like your husband is in denial about his faith...which is good, and he will come around, it’s just something everyone has do decide on their own. I understand totally about the Harry Potter thing...I remember the church I had attended way back put up a report on "evil" games that need to be banned from christian households, some of these were: Chutes and Ladders, Candyland, Pokemon and I think even Clue. It’s really ridiculous. But be strong, you can do it! Oh and welcome to the Atheist community. ^_^
Nate, I spent about 15 years (broken up by military reassignments) in Texas, in the homeschool community. You want to meet people who see the devil behind every bush, that's where a lot of them are. And the hive mind mentality is shocking. And some even went as far as banning fairy tales or even any fiction books, because they are made up. Not kidding. I wish I was. I felt like a tourist trapped in the craziest country ever. I currently have a friend who is proud of her teen son for believing that the Lincoln Memorial is a graven idol. O_O
The games you mentioned reminded me of a thread I read somewhere else recently about a book that went around back in the 90's telling over-the-top xtian parents what games were evil. I'm guessing your church got it's hands on that book too. Glad you saw the truth at such an early age.
Thanks again for the welcome and encouragement.
lol! Ohhhh the Homeschool Community, the nostalgia! Yeah I was homeschooled for the first half of my education... I remember those "get togethers." And the subject in one of my Lifepac classes titled: "Bible." Yeah those people can be pretty scary, I also remember our church doing burnings on a regular basis, the pastor would encourage the congregation to bring anything from home that was secular: Books, pictures, movies, furniture, all kinds of crap, and sadly it was always a huge bonfire by the end of the night (Wasn’t that big of a church either). But kudos on you surviving Homeschool TX, that is a major accomplishment. ^^ That Lincoln Idol thing though...still shaking my head about that, Im curious about what they think about the Statue of Liberty lol.
Furniture? This ottoman is obviously muslim and that modern chaise lounge--unabashedly secular!
Inorite!? Yeah I remember when I was younger we had these oversized wooden spoon and fork decorations that we had hanging on our wall (I think they were my grandparents or something) but they had carvings on the handles that looked kind of tribal looking or something, but I remember mentioning to my parents that the carvings looked like they had faces on them. Immediately my parents grabbed them, took them outside and broke them in two and said a prayer. They said it looked like demon faces and it was satanic... stupid shit like that. lol *facepalm*
Pretty sure they think the same about Liberty, Nate.
I hated Lifepacs with a passion. I wanted my kids to LEARN, not be creepy uneducated little automatons. To this day, I put people who recommend Lifepacs in a different category in my mind, the one with people I can't really respect because they prefer not to think for themselves.
"surviving Homeschool Texas* I love that and will have to share it with my kids when I tell them the whole thing. Book and anything else secular burnings? Dang! I bet they cherrypicked that to pieces. I mean, TV and computers are secular. And cookbooks, and breakfast cereals, and stoats. *hopes Nate gets the Monty Python reference.
Yeah, and I remember there being kind of an unwritten rivalry between people who used Lifepacs and PACEs, like there was really any difference… then again...they were christians...
Poor Liberty, and she was a classy lady too.
lol glad you liked it, yeah it got ridiculous...and when a kid sees toys and things getting burned that they want... kinda fuc*ed up. lmao yes! From the Book of Armaments, Chapter 2, verses 9 through 21 right?