Ever meet someone who always refers to Jesus as Christ Jesus? Or Jesus Lord Christ? Or some other combination or permutation of Jesus, Christ, Savior, or Lord. It just sounds much holier than plain 'ole Jesus. As if you wouldn't know who they were talking about without all the superfluous-ness. Preachers have invented a whole vernacular to sound "preach-ier". And some of their best followers begin to imitate.

If I hit my thumb with a hammer, I will either yell "Phuck" or "Jesus H. Christ". I don't know if the H is for "Haploid" or "Henry", but I don't care. Somehow it makes my thumb feel better. If there was to be a place called hell, I am pretty sure at least a few of the dammed would be walking around saying "Jesus H. Christ, it's hot down here".

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This my date me, but I always thought the H stood for Hallmark, because the father cared enough to send the very best.

How about Jesus Fuckung Christ, and sometimes I simultaneously recall a comic drawing of a jesus penis chasing a jesus vagina. To take this further, I'd like to ask some holier-than-thou fundies to similarly imagine Mohammed (pbuh, or is it pbj sandwich), chasing another.

No, wait, JC and Mo together! Sometimes I wish fundies could just accidentally read my mind.

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Posted by Quincy Maxwell on July 20, 2014 at 9:37pm 25 Comments

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