Let's make these off-the-wall.
Of course, I'd buy a Bugatti Veyron. That goes without saying, but it's not crazy enough. One thing I might like to do if I had the funds would be to build a working Nautilus submarine. The one from Disney's movie 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea.
What would YOU do with your money?
Please, no "I'd contribute it to curing cancer" or "I'd feed all the starving children of the world" type statements.
We're looking for something crazy and very selfish. You can use another thread to impress us with your generosity and concern for mankind.
Buy a church and put signs all over it saying stuff like "it's all nonsense by the way".
After taking care of the things my family and I need (house, bills paid off, etc) I want to buy a bunch of apartment buildings and houses low income and homeless families. I also want to create a big cat sanctuary. Yes, I know I'm boring ;) .
First I would go through my experiment(Secret). I would then use the rest to build a large underground lunar colony of which I would be king.
After sharing a good sum with people on Scientific research, Education and Humanitarian assistance programes.. I'll declare myself king of the world.
And date girls like this one
How about Steve Martin's Christmas wishes?
I'd buy a large plot of land, hire a crack team of engineers, architects, city planners etc. and build an experimental town which sought to optimize livability, sustainability, and artistry. It'd be like a fully developed concept car.... only much, much bigger.
Perhaps it is a subtle way of him saying if he had enough money to not need to work, he'd write a corny joke book?
I think what we are seeing is the effect of an extended brain-fart while typing. :D