I Keep Hearing That Women Doubt the Beauty of Their Vagina. Really?

I keep hearing that many women have a fear that their vagina is ugly.  This seems absurd to me, as the idea of an ugly vagina is complete nonsense to me.  Do women really fear this?  Furthermore, I've heard from time to time a guy will say they find vaginas ugly.  This boggles my mind.  I'm curious, any boys or girls willing to admit what they think? (besides me - too late)

Tags: Beauty, Doubt, Their, Vagina, Women, of, the

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A vagina is internal and cannot be seen.  Unless you get a speculum and a mirror(in which case you really see the cervix), you see almost none of the actual vagina.  The very opening can be seen,  Is a man's seminal vesicle ugly?  It is internal, so who knows or cares?  It amazes me how people who believe that a god made their bodies are made ashamed of them, especially in regard to anything to do with sex.  That whole Garden of Eden stuff was always suspect to me and to me is anti-female.  Why are we the only being(of which I am aware) that worries about things like that and feels shame or worry in that regard?

The Vagina Monologues speak about it as though the vagina were external but it is not.  That is the vulva.  At the end of the book, the author got a letter inviting her to join a group begun by Harriet Lerner,(The Dance of Anger, and many other the Dance of ... books) while making the point that it is the vulva of which they speak, not the vagina.  I do see that so many people know it as such that the author used it because it was recognizable and perhaps more shocking, but I had hoped in her presentation(she reached a wide audience and could have educated people) she would correct the mistaken perception that vaginas are external.

If you are old enough, you may remember the 'speech' by Rosaeann Rosannadanna(spelling?) on SNL arguing about it when the topic was 'Volvo' and she was 'confused', as her character was every week.


Harriet Lerner's book was the first time I had really been made aware that vulva was the proper term, unless one wanted to say 'external female genitalia'.  Her point is that females are not even taught how to name parts of our anatomy.  So when I remember I try to say 'Viss' or 'Vee'! ;-)  Read the first part of The Dance of Anger to see how she explains it.

Please let us not waste our time and energy feeling self-conscious about what is, and develop the people we are so we are loved for what we do and not how we look.


Just as there are endless variations in noses and face shapes, etc., there will be some differences in vulvas. I have never been worried about how mine looks or smells or tastes.  I figure that any lover I have had is lucky if I let them see it or touch with it.  And I am not at all impressed with the way that the male genitalia looks.  Why would I buy Playgirl?  Who wants to look at limp ones, anyway? 

I think the 'ugliest' part of the body is under the tongue, if I had to choose.  The body is the way it is.  Even our notions of beauty are influenced by what others we grew up with look like.  So perhaps the Japanese think they are prettier than Caucasians.  I do not follow the crowd.  If I like it, that is enough.  I do not care if no one else agrees.  That is why I do not have a lot of problems feeling 'weird' because I do not believe in gods.  If anything, I feel sorry for them because they are misguided, IMO. 

Our culture gives us enough crap messages to conform to and worry about.  We do not have to buy into it and feel less because of some preconceived notion of what is 'pretty' and what is 'ugly'.

I am female and I have never heard any who fear that the way theirs looks would not be acceptable to someone.  We are so judgemental in general.  If we spent more time on worthy pursuits, we would have much less time to worry about things that like that.  I am not purportiong to be a paragon, but I remind myself often to stop the silliness and focus on what is important.

We all need to love ourselves.


I guess I need to ask the question, 'Must they be beautiful?'

At this moment it would seem that I must enter into the mysteries, I think I will hold back, just in case children are present ;p)

Who are you asking. Women aspire to beauty and (most of them) want to have a beautiful body, so why not genitalia?


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