I Don't Want Your Pity on Account of my Atheism!
My mother and I have never really clicked.
In fact, that could be the understatement of the century. But I accept it. It's what I've become used to.
What I cannot tolerate, however, is her sympathy. Her 'pity' for my godlessness.
It's the condescending, 'Oh, sweetheart, you'll see someday. You'll get over this radical collegiate phase,'
It's that, 'Bless your soul. I'll pray that you find the truth,'
Or, my absolute FAVORITE -
'Why are you doing this to yourself?'
And she rolls her eyes. Shakes her head. Appeals to heaven.
[Rinse with holy water, and repeat.]
The woman thinks I am dooming myself to a bleak worldview; she finds my lack of faith almost masochistic. Her line of thought goes something like this (be warned - it's based entirely on religious assumptions):
-------> God exists and He is good.
------>With his goodness, God has created everything in the universe.
----->Thus, good human beings owe their goodness to God.
---->Humans, then, who credit their goodness elsewhere (say, to their upbringing or personal moral compass) are self centered and ignorant of the larger picture.
--->This blind here-and-now humanistic worldview will result in the individual foolishly and blasphemously disconnecting his/herself with God.
-->Without contact with the divine, the individual will induce misery and bring about his/her own demise.
->Thus, I, as an atheist, am subconsciously, tragically dooming myself to depression and the pursuit of profane, fleeting pleasure as opposed to a lasting peace with God.
Right. Of course. Silly me. Because that's such tight logic, right?
On top of this, my uncle promised that he would pray for me so that I don't eternally burn with the sinners and heathens. He also called my brother a worshiper of the Antichrist because he listens to metal music.
Has anyone else encountered condescending sentiment similar to this, or is it just my Polish Catholic family?
In fact, that could be the understatement of the century. But I accept it. It's what I've become used to.
What I cannot tolerate, however, is her sympathy. Her 'pity' for my godlessness.
It's the condescending, 'Oh, sweetheart, you'll see someday. You'll get over this radical collegiate phase,'
It's that, 'Bless your soul. I'll pray that you find the truth,'
Or, my absolute FAVORITE -
'Why are you doing this to yourself?'
And she rolls her eyes. Shakes her head. Appeals to heaven.
[Rinse with holy water, and repeat.]
The woman thinks I am dooming myself to a bleak worldview; she finds my lack of faith almost masochistic. Her line of thought goes something like this (be warned - it's based entirely on religious assumptions):
-------> God exists and He is good.
------>With his goodness, God has created everything in the universe.
----->Thus, good human beings owe their goodness to God.
---->Humans, then, who credit their goodness elsewhere (say, to their upbringing or personal moral compass) are self centered and ignorant of the larger picture.
--->This blind here-and-now humanistic worldview will result in the individual foolishly and blasphemously disconnecting his/herself with God.
-->Without contact with the divine, the individual will induce misery and bring about his/her own demise.
->Thus, I, as an atheist, am subconsciously, tragically dooming myself to depression and the pursuit of profane, fleeting pleasure as opposed to a lasting peace with God.
Right. Of course. Silly me. Because that's such tight logic, right?
On top of this, my uncle promised that he would pray for me so that I don't eternally burn with the sinners and heathens. He also called my brother a worshiper of the Antichrist because he listens to metal music.
Has anyone else encountered condescending sentiment similar to this, or is it just my Polish Catholic family?
Tags: argument, atheism, condescending, family, intolerance, pity, prayer, psychology, rift
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Kris Feenstra on -
Well, at least this hints at an answer to the the question of where God came from. In all likelihood, from an abusive family. I suspect alcoholism or drug abuse is/ was involved.
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Permalink Reply by Eoganacht on -
And he created a small universe to play in. Like a child building a sand castle only to destroy it while pretending to be a dinosaur! A good metaphor!
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Permalink Reply by Owen on -
My Christian younger sister claims she finds this offensive, but she's fine with all the signs outside churches.
(As I mentioned in another thread, though, she's not good with any challenge to her faith, no matter how slight or even unintentional. I think it's because deep down she knows that her faith will not stand up to examination, so I'm giving her time to come round on her own.)
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Permalink Reply by Amy Victoria on -
I love this.
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Permalink Reply by Eoganacht on
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THe ballons are a good addtion. Gives atheism a 'party' feel. Party forever in Hell! Sweet as!
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Permalink Reply by Amy Victoria on
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I would have to suppress an intense urge to vandalize those signs, but I suppose that would just fuel the image that I am some 'devil child' (because, OH NO, skepticism is going to be the end of the world!).
Also, THANK YOU for putting in a word to get this featured :)
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Permalink Reply by luvtheheaven on -
I know it's hard to read but I just saw this ad for a church yesterday while on a moving bus so I tried to to take a picture with my phone. ;)
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Permalink Reply by Nicole Valentino on -
My mother (who was raised Polish Catholic) and I are really close and we go through the exact same thing. My mom is smart, too. Really smart. She understands all the science and history and how it negates a lot of the Bible's validity, but to her it isn't about that, it is about faith. About knowing all that and still believing that there is still a god and that it is good. It seems as silly to us as our logic is to them. I live in Florida on the same street as about 25 churches (and one temple) and people are constantly praying for me. Don't take it personally. I have come to realize that they just want what they believe it best for you. I just say "Thank you." and move on with my life. It is annoying, no doubt, but not really much can be done. Just take a deep breath and count to 10. I figure if I'm wrong, I had like 150 people praying for me, so I should be covered just in case. *wink*
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Permalink Reply by Amy Victoria on
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I know that (most) people don't mean it badly - it probably means that they just care about you a lot. And while I do feel hypocritical sometimes, because, on some level, I look down on theists TOO, I always come back to a main issue: it's the logic. I find Atheism superior, more intelligent because it recognizes that God is not falsifiable. It is simply incorrect to argue anything else. There is no rhyme or reason to blind faith - in anything. I maintain an open mind - if some added spectrum of light, energy, etc. is found to PROVE the existence of a higher power or maybe 'angels,' I will change my mind. Until then, I side with skepticism.
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Permalink Reply by Robert E. O'Dell on -
You can't answer questions with answers that raise even larger questions. If God made everything, what did he make it from? And who made him? How long did he exsist before he made everything? If he has always existed, why didn't he make everything sooner?........ Why don't they just cut the God crap, and just realize that there are real, logical, scientific answers to questions like the origin of man, and the universe, that can only be found by those who search for the real answers; and real answers don't involve a magic man, either with or without a magic wand or magic dust.
Good thread Amy. Good luck with your family! Thanks for your skepticism!
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Permalink Reply by Eoganacht on
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Very true. By the time you realize that it raises more questions than answers the only real answer you can give is 'because it was always there'. If you give this answer to the nature of the divine then you could have just said that life always existed and not mention a deity at all rather than making up excuses and then nullifying all the excuses with a 'just because'.
If you can answer questions with the evidence given and not jump to conclusions permaturely, you will eventually find all the answers. (time permitting, of course)
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