How do I handle...

My father is currently in the hospital on life support, the prognosis isn't good. People are kind enough to "keep me in their prayers" or "pray for you at this difficult time". Is this one of those times I should just bite my tongue and say nothing? Or do I respond? If so, what do I say?

This in regards to certain people who keep saying this too me and do know I don't believe in gods

0 members like this

▶ Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Emmy Ellison on April 5, 2011 at 11:14pm

Billie-Jo's father is ill, but still alive as far as we know. "I'm sorry for your loss" is ok to say if you truely mean it. "I'll keep you and your friend in my thoughts" is what people said to me when my close friend was in the hospital and dying from cancer. He passed away in September. His family is religious so the service was in a church... to let you in on how important he is to me, I still went. I was respectful of their beliefs while in their space. As they were thanking people for coming, as we exited the church, they were saying "god bless you" to people. They said "thank you for coming. You must really love him" to me. Some people can be considerate. It's a shame more can't be.

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by James on April 5, 2011 at 11:50pm

Sorry to hear about your father. :(

In cases like this, I tend to focus on the fact that their intent is positive. While prayer does no good to help, the sentiment itself is one that shows they care. Arguing with them in this context would be in bad taste. Sometimes you just have to pick you battles. I'd suggest thanking them in a way that doesn't cause a rift, but also allows you to avoid compromising your beliefs. "Thanks for thinking about us." or "Thanks, It's good to know you're there for us." Something in that vain should fit the bill.

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Billie-Jo Schuyler on April 25, 2011 at 2:15pm

Thank you all for your concerns and advice. In the end I just ignored it all. My father has managed to pull through and his prognosis looks good. Thanks again

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Jim Minion on April 26, 2011 at 12:40am

In your situation I ask them to pray for the doctors, I'm very glad to hear your father is doing well.

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by 3equ3cp1fsw0n on April 27, 2011 at 7:53am

Wow. That is fantastic that your father came back after having so many difficulties. I am so happy to hear this. I hope you are having a wonderful time being able to be with him fully again.

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Billie-Jo Schuyler on April 27, 2011 at 7:59am

It's just amazing, if I were religious I'd be thanking god, but since I'm not medical science saves yet another life! There were times when the doctors didn't think he'd make it, it really is quite shocking. and he's down under 200lbs for the first time in years, he's so skinny I hardly recognize him. Thanks again for all your well wishes.