i was talking about the existence of Jesus Christ, is he real? why should i believe him? where is he now?

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i can understand four languages, "spanish, japanese, english, tagalog"

Congratulations, Micmic - I'm still working on English, and I'm American!

I have to tell you my friend, Filipinas are some of the most beautiful women in the world! But you probably already know that.

you were right my friend, filipinas are one of the most caring wife too.,

Sounds like you live in paradise - tropical climate, beautiful women, who could ask for anything more?

Gren fa hoe loth pex-pil?

Or, as the Ferengi would understand it, "Haven't you got that translator fixed yet?"

"OK, Scotty, very funny! Now beam down my clothes!"

Q: Is [Jesus Christ] real?
A:  Yes.

Q: Why should I believe him?
A:  You shouldn't. He stole my bike and sold it to buy drugs. I'm not casting moral judgment, but it seems like the guy's developed some issues over the last couple thousand years.

Q: Where is he now?
A:  Working part time at Walmart. He signed a shit contract releasing the rights to his life story, and now he doesn't see a dime in royalties. He can't chill in Heaven any more because dad is sick of him living in the basement without paying rent.

Honestly, one of my major issues with a religion such as Christianity isn't even about its veracity. Once you entertain god-level magic, anything and everything becomes plausible, so I'm not going to waste my time on finding truth where none can exist. No, what gets to me is that at the foundations of the religion, Christianity seeks to answer a difficult riddle with an unsolvable riddle, and that practice in itself is an exercise in madness (in my opinion, at least).

Q: Is [Jesus Christ] real?
A:  Yes.

I am on board with a Hispanic God. If there is an afterlife, I don't want the food to be bland.

Ha!  On the matter of holy food, there's a rumor going around that the Catholic church is about to produce a low calorie, low fat communion wafer. 

It is going to be called, "I can't believe it's not Jesus"

That would be a pretty emphatic "cant".

I didn't realize there was a concern regarding the caloric content of cardboard.

I recall a Catholic advising me to let Jesus enter my spirit. I explained that if Jesus wants to enter any part of me, he should at least buy me dinner first. Then I recalled that Catholics deem communion wafers food. My negotiation terms were ill-advised.

If the Catholics want to gain ground in places like America, I suggest a move in the opposite direction with a switch to communion double stuffed Oreos.

NOW who's causing spit-takes?!!


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