Weird question I know. However when I came out as an atheist and then have some threatening notes and things left in your mail box? I moved to keep it away from my grandparents. I did start a blog to keep talking to keep me sane but I feel like I failed and am now completely freaked out to put my name on my blog.I even think I lost a job partly because of the books I was checking out freaked out the librarian training me.
My mom and sister are concerned but okay with it. My dad, a devout catholic, cried. My fiance' just joined the military so the only person I could really relate to on being a freethinker left. I feel really alone here.
Sounds like a crisis, alright!
Well, you've come to the right place. The community here will help you connect with hundreds of people in a situation at least similar to yours. I'm starting to see this pattern in American atheism. I swear, we should have our own check-box option for Out of the Closet, Out to Some, In the Closet, In the Closet and in a Hostile Region, Militant.ect...(Hey, Morgan! That's an idea. Can you do that? Haha.)
Anyway. My point is, there are so many of us here in various places in our lives that someone out there has to be going through the same. We are a community. That means support of at least some type, right? So come here to vent. Just blow off some steam. Get it all off your chest. It might help keep you sane. Come here to ask opinions. Seriously. You'll be amazed at how many people there are who know what you're going through. Come here just to hang out. It's nice to be able to type what you REALLY think in comments and posts..no worries about family members getting upset on FB.
Feel free to add me as a friend. I'm good for email if you ever want to chat.
Thank you. I am glad I found this. Normally I am a much more up beat person. I just wish that people didn't get all bug eyed when I tell them or my Wiccan friend was talking about another friend of ours, when I asked what was going on she said I wouldn't understand or I would think it was stupid because I was an atheist.
She was having an existential crisis. Why would I think that was stupid? Doesn't Everyone have those? Worst part was, after she told me Tiffy was having this existential crisis, she had to ASK me what exactly was an existential crisis.... sigh... so I told her and went home.
"However when I came out as an atheist and then have some threatening notes and things left in your mail box? I moved to keep it away from my grandparents."
So when exactly did you come out, and to whom? Then what exactly were the notes and when did you get them? XD You were living with your grandparents...? Or just near them? Can you share a bit more of your story with us to better help us understand your situation? I don't even know if you're a man or woman lol. Not that it matters really but sometimes it's nice to be able to paint a picture in my head.
It sounds horrible, so you were trying to work in a library but they noticed which books you were checking out so you lost the job?
I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of that. Luckily I haven't experienced anything nearly like that personally, although my uncles especially and kinda my grandmother don't seem to know how to react to me telling them I'm an atheist. I'd love to be able to be there for you though and help keep you sane in whatever way I can!
I moved in with my grandparents after college. I found a job at a library, the head librarians were all pretty devout christians, the woman who replaced me was a parishioner of my trainer's church. I realized I was 100% atheist after being called one. So I read the bible, 3 times, and that was it. I started checking out the books at work. The head children's librarian noticed and would always shake her head. Told me I couldn't be so 'friendly' with the children. I rarely talked to them besides to get them to stop throwing snowballs at the windows but they though I was young and fun, lol. The head librarian said I didn't get adequate training while she was away but she was back now. An hour after she went home sick the head childrens librarian and the director sat me down said it wasn't working and it would be best for everyone if I saved face and quit.
I had check out I don't know how many books on Atheism in that month I worked there and load 'Letters to a Christian Nation' to a co-worker. Three days later I found a note in my grandparents mail box. It was addressed to me. It was a long and graphic hellfire and damnation note and how I deserved it.
I do community theater and only a few from the theater knew but I never hid the books. There is one family that took particular exception to me. They won't let their kids in to the public schools because they teach science. The father is a carpenter to follow in the lord's footsteps. Their son was in the play with me and he even called me the devil at one point. I got a second note a few months later demanding I repent. I didn't want to risk someone confronting my grandparents. They are a respected couple. Papa is a widely respected vet, gramma volunteers. So even though I couldn't afford to I moved out. Now I'm working three jobs and the love of my life joined the army to save us from boring unemployed life. I feel a little isolated now that he's gone. The other friends I have here are Wiccan or whatever religion is that believes in the power of the Ruins... he talks about multiple gods, anyway it's sucks that I get all this pity when I'm not the one that is crazy, it's not a phase but I feel like I cannot be an open and opinionated person like I've always been...
Sorry for being such a downer. I have been told I can be fantastically hilarious (c;
It sounds like you need to try your best not to let the insanity bring you down and eventually when you are able move far away... the coasts of the US, especially near the most major cities, are much more tolerant of the non-religious.
I'm so sorry you have to go through all of that, it really sounds like it sucks. And the job thing is really illegal and I wish there was an easy and quick way to essentially "sue" them but I know it's not practical. XD
Well good luck with your life and feel free to talk about anything you ever want to here with us. ;) We're a great community and we know you're not the crazy one. And we welcome hilarity too haha!
I don't think you failed in any way. If anyone failed it was the assholes who left the threatening notes in your mailbox, they failed in being tolerant of other beliefs. Anyone would be scared if they had threatening notes sent to them. Reacting to all of that in the way you did is not failing. You did what you thought would keep you & your family safe.
Anyways, welcome to TA. :)
PS - Join us in the chat room. Check out the chat controls at the bottom right corner of your browser window.
It is a hard thing to go against the norm, for sure. Usually I keep my mouth shut, though I never back away if asked directly. I used to work for a semi-fundy corp, and they would have daily prayers that I did not attend. Eventually it stopped feeling weird, but at the same time I never fit in there and I am certain some of that seeped into other aspects of the job. But losing it led to better things.
But there is an art to being an unbeliever and still being part of an in-group. The question is what in-group do you want to be a part of and why, at the end of the day. Figuring that out is not easy, but you grow as a person in the process, and you may find before all is said and done that you really appreciate all the trials.
After the fact...
i've been stating, arguing, struggling that i dont believe there is/are god/s since 6 years ago, somehow i dont get plenty of heat; as in i dont get threat letter, bullying, or stone thrown at me BUT i might had some mock on my back.
luckly i'm not a social type of person, as in i dont really care about getting around socially and i have a small group of friends and none of them are irreligious..some of them are even pretty religious; i dont have problem cutting down or being cut down in relation/s for being myself.
as alone as you'd be, do know..there are people out there that feel the same with you...this site is just 1 way on how you connect with them :)
Relatives just love it- me out of a particular cult, they are much happier now that i am an atheist hahaha!!!!