I was wondering how those people come up with this kind situation in their life, choosing an option where you don't like both of it, losing someone, your wife just to save the baby..
A dilemma (Greek: δί-λημμα "double proposition") is a problem offering two possibilities, neither of which is practically acceptable. One in this position has been traditionally described as "being on the horns of a dilemma", neither horn being comfortable. This is sometimes more colorfully described as "Finding oneself impaled upon the horns of a dilemma", referring to the sharp points of a bull's horns, equally uncomfortable (and dangerous).
The dilemma is sometimes used as a rhetorical device, in the form "you must accept either A, or B"; here A and B would be propositions each leading to some further conclusion. Applied incorrectly, it constitutes a false dichotomy, a fallacy.
I would say that it is an utterly tragic dilemma that I have never been in and would not want to be. Some might call it a "moral dilemma" but since I've never been that situation I would refrain from using that exact terminology. Sorry I can't be of more help.
In my neighborhood we just call these "false choices". Its how you get what you want in life; those that can shower people with false choices win every time. Just ask Henry Kissinger.
I was wondering how those people come up with this kind situation in their life
Going back and looking at your opening line, I'm guessing I missed your question with my first response? The answer to that, in my experience, is that we get in false choice situtations because the people we deal with in our everyday lives are sociopaths and narcissists, who are experts at doing this to each other.
Death or Bonga Bonga?