Dealing with the inevitable

I think the hardest part of deconverting is dealing with the fact that this is it. After being told from a young age that you will live for eternity after you die, it is sometimes hard to face reality that existance is much much shorter than originally thought. How do you all deal with this fact and get in the right mindset to best handle it?

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Permalink Reply by Karen Loethen on February 15, 2012 at 3:44pm

Not to be flip, honestly.

I don't have a problem with this. But in the beginning for me, I reminded myself that I didn't exist for an eternity BEFORE my birth either. It won't be any different.
I also used to need to remind myself to live this life fully in order to make a difference now.

Keep connecting, thinking, talking. It will get so much easier after alot of the religious dogma falls away.

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Permalink Reply by onecae on February 20, 2012 at 9:12pm

These ideas of time, life, and mind are not necessarily theistic. One can have an opinion that there are minds other than the human one, that universes can be infinite and parallel, that life is a purposeful agreement between similar beings, that the concept of "nothing" is unreal, or the subjective identity is primary etc., without being theistic.

I think the Catholics are exploiting and usurping something that can occur to any living thing.

There is a common agreement that no one living can prove what it is like to die - whether there is nothing (whatever that is) or more than nothing, the rules, as I know them, say we cannot know.

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Permalink Reply by Reason Being on February 22, 2012 at 1:12pm

For me that was a hard concept to grasp at first. Once I got my head around it, I was okay. I just try to make the most of each day. Try to be a good person, husband, friend---and to enjoy life.

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Permalink Reply by Biniam on February 24, 2012 at 5:51am

The brain has different ways of distracting itself from full awareness of unpleasant thoughts, and feelings. These ways are called defense mechanisms. The way I dealt with mortality is rationalization, which is one of the major defense mechanisms. I think that living forever, and ever in a utopia where there is no conflict is very boring. So, if you just found out you are an atheist, just give yourself some time to get used to it. You might use a different defense mechanism than i did, but it will happen sooner or later.

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Permalink Reply by Grady Jean on February 24, 2012 at 6:11pm

It may have been easier for me to handle the idea of death because before choosing Atheism, I was convinced I was going to burn forever in hell. I was already becoming jaded and disillusioned with the whole idea of the Christian Religion. I didn't care to convert to any other faith, and at the time I hadn't really considered Atheism as an option. When I finally did become an Atheist, the knowledge that I'd simply "cease" to exist was a heck of a lot more welcoming than the idea of spending all of eternity burning for some small sin or trivial mistake.

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Permalink Reply by Tom Holm on May 1, 2012 at 5:57pm

That's exactly how I felt

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Permalink Reply by Kelin420 on May 29, 2012 at 5:19am

You were born an atheist...as we all are.

You were just brought up by parents who were brought up by parents, in a society, in a country....and so on... that are religious.

So by "choosing" atheism, you are really going back to the belief (or lack there-of) you were born with.

You didn't get to chose the religion your parents brought you up with (no options to consider).

You didn't finally become an atheist, nor did anyone else:

We are all born atheist- we are taught religion

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Permalink Reply by archaeopteryx on May 29, 2012 at 6:08am

EXcellent point!

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Permalink Reply by Mabel on May 29, 2012 at 8:53am

Kelin! How you doing? Great to see you back (my profile name used to be flower in case you don't remember me lol).

I agree and 'the where you were born and who you were born to' is one of my favorite things to point out when talking to theists.

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Permalink Reply by Doug Reardon on February 24, 2012 at 11:25pm

Why do people get upset with not living for forever and not with having already missed as much?

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Permalink Reply by Judith van der Roos on February 25, 2012 at 8:57am

I say let the mystery be.
One day this thing that is me will stop, all that is physically me will quietly disassemble and my atoms will go off and be part of many other things, maybe even back to the stars where they, for the most part, came from. All that is me has been around for millions, even billions of years and they will continue - how amazing is that, we are quite literally "Star Stuff" !

The memory of me will continue in those who have known and loved me. I hope that those will be good memories based on the love and care I have tried to propagate and from those memories of me others will try and spread the same, I ask for no more.

Live, love, spread compassion today & tomorrow, tread lightly on Mother Earth - in these things find purpose and peace.

regards,
Judith vd R.

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Permalink Reply by Scott Howard on February 29, 2012 at 8:25pm

Ironically, I'm liberated by it. I can explain why, I just am. The only thing that bums me is that wrongs won't be righted and unrecognized good won't get rewarded. I had always liked the idea that god would balance the scales. But, other than that one caveat, I'm good. This life is what we've got so live it to the fullest which, to me, means be the best you that you can.