Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Bronson on January 6, 2011 at 7:42pm

Exactly Quality>Quantity. 

There are also factors such as being hit by a bus etc. That would make it inevitable to avoid death in the first place. I personally see no harm in having the occasional drink or cigar.

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Permalink Reply by claudio fernando maciel on January 6, 2011 at 8:24am

Well, atheism didn't help with my fear of death. 

Though nowadays I find it a lot easier to deal with that subject, than it was in the past. By the past I mean right when I became an atheist. 

I can't explain, just irrational really. I guess I love so much life that I do not want to even think of not being alive, or perhaps it's what Fred said, that it makes us feel so helpless because there is no fighting against it. Not sure. Just hate the idea and try to avoid thinking about it. 

 

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Permalink Reply by Mo Trauen on January 6, 2011 at 10:32am

I have reached the stage in life where the thought of death bothers me primarily because of all the things I would leave undone--things I want to do for those I love before I die. 

 

One thing to remember is that to Buddhists the cessation of one's existence as an individual is Nirvana.  I think that is exactly what will happen when I die.  As implied by the Twain quote above I will no longer have any individual consciousness and will simply rejoin the universe.  Or, as the Dalai Lama said to the hot dog vendor:  "Make me one with everything."

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Permalink Reply by Kirk Holden on January 6, 2011 at 11:01am

I am in the middle of 'The Happiness Myth' by Jennifer Michael Hecht and she brings up the history of death vs. happiness. The main point is that we do not see enough dead and dying people anymore. She points out that in a death bed scenes were common until recently because people died at home in bed and many friends and relations gathered around the dying and celebrated the moment of passing because - get this - even religious people did not take eternal afterlife as a literal promise but focused on the bald fact of human mortality. Especially children were called in to witness their eventual place on the death bed. Death bed scenes were rarely omitted from Edwardian and Victorian drama. Finally, in a survey taken [citation needed] most people over 70 had witnessed a friend or relative at the moment of death and almost no person under 30 had witnessed a death.

 

Hecht, a philosopher/poet/atheist claims that religion assisted us with a realistic view of death through rituals that increased our happiness by decreasing the anxiety about our own end.

 

BTW if you are not already listening to the Rationally Speaking podcast, episode 14 with Ms. Hecht is an epic win.

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Permalink Reply by Jennifer Ulean Breedlove on January 6, 2011 at 3:05pm

Death freaks people out because they know that it is the end of everything as they know it.

Truth is time will go on, Mankind will continue to evolve, and afterlife's and heavens are created as a way to explain how you will continue to be a part of it all. It is a story to make us rest better, to explain to our children where the dog went when he died, or how to help them to cope with the death of a loved one.

It is one of the biggest lies to overcome and to deal with.

Having been through a horrible car wreck and caused me to literally be pronounced dead, after code blue had been called 2 times, I am here to tell you I didn't see angels or god.

How do you come to terms with it? Well I have accepted it. My legacy has been full filled when my body gives out, it is time for that energy to shift and become chaos again.

I am merely an animal that is here to breed and eat, live and die. I am actually relieved to be able to say that knowingly and with acceptance. I am not afraid to die because I know that there is not anther side to this all that will disappoint me as much as life here has and can.

It will just be.. Finally no more worrying, no more sadness, no more watching the ones that I love have to face life, and live in fear of the end.

You will not know when you are dead.. It will just be over, and in that time life will continue to blossom, and grow, and years will go by, and you will still be dead.

Living life the best that you can in the here and now, loving yourself to keep you going as long as you can, because it is true that you don't get another chance. I hope this helps..

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Permalink Reply by Bronson on January 6, 2011 at 7:53pm

When you put it like that the concept of Death seems much more beautiful, than merely slipping into a dark void of endless slumber. Thank you, this did help me a bit =)

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Permalink Reply by Ricardo on January 6, 2011 at 4:13pm

Maybe it sounds weird, but I was never afraid of death.  When I was a believer I was sure I would go to heaven, and now that I am an atheist I know my conscience will simply cease to exist.  No worries, no pain, no suffering.

That said, it doesn’t mean I would welcome death now. I have three children that need me, and my death would really harm them.  Let’s say my task is not finished yet.  And of course I find life very enjoyable.  It would be a pity to depart now, when I can still enjoy all the good things of life.  Dying would be like the end of a very good party.  When I reach old age, with all its limitations, I will probably think otherwise and welcome death.   But with a bit of luck I will still have twenty years of useful life ahead.

But thereis another important point here. Although I don’t fear death, I fear the process of dying.  Dying can be a very painful and protractedprocess. I hope I will die  with minimumpain.  Dying during sleep would not bebad.

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Permalink Reply by Mo Trauen on January 6, 2011 at 5:42pm

"Dying can be a very painful and protracted process."

 

Especially if your caregivers are religious.

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Permalink Reply by Layla on January 6, 2011 at 4:49pm

When I turned 20 I began having severe panic attacks about my death and the death of the ones I love. I would cry and shake and have all of the horrible thoughts that I couldn't seem to overcome. So, I can understand your fears and how the quiet of lying in bed can give you time to contemplate death and dying. Hopefully I can help your fears a little bit. I started working at one of our local hospitals a little while back on a Long Term Acute Care floor. When I started there I had no idea how much I would come in contact with death and it's process. I was terrified of having to be in the room with someone when they died and having to clean and shroud their body after they had passed away. Then the day came. I was standing in the room with one of my patients who had been suffering for quite a long time. His vital signs started dropping rapidly and I knew he was dying. For a moment I started to panic and felt that I didn't know what to do for him. And then it hit me, that this was his chance to be free. So I sat by his bed and held his hand and talked with him and prayed with him ( I didn't know what religion he was or if he believed in any but I felt it was right to pray for him or with him if he could still hear me as a comfort to him ) and told him that I hoped he was able to be free from what he was going through. And in a instant he silently slipped away. It was peaceful and quiet and I felt that he was finally able to not be a prisioner in his own body anymore. I know see death as a process that we must all go through. Sometimes it is painless, if we are lucky, and others it is seems more than we can handle. But in the end it is just peace. It's natural. It's freedom. We are all lucky to be here. And I can not say that there is no God or that when we die that there is no heaven or after-life. I don't claim to know it all. But what I can say is that from all the deaths and processes of dying that I have be so lucky to be a part of, is is a beautiful release of pain and suffering that none of should fear.  

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Permalink Reply by Bronson on January 6, 2011 at 8:05pm

I don't know if I could ever do that. I admire your strength and reasonable assumptions towards the whole God concept. Wether someone is religious or not, I don't think it really matters when it's time to die. 

 

There are some priests who at funerals will ask if the person was religious or not. Because even if a person believes in nothing, that nothing is still something. One should respect the dead regardless of their beliefs (Unless of course they were twisted serial killers or something...). 

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Permalink Reply by Layla on January 7, 2011 at 1:24am

Thank you for the above compliment. And I hope that I never come across a "twisted serial killer or something" in my entire life, lol. At the time I was a Christian. I have just become newly aware of the world around me and the fact that everthing I have ever been taught is fiction instead of fact. I am still not what you would call atheist but more a person seeking knowledge and willing to learn more at this point.

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Permalink Reply by Julien on January 6, 2011 at 5:50pm

If you are interested, people gave me a few advices about this over here.

 

The predominant one, which I would like to pass on to you, is 'live your life to the fullest'.

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