We have no religious hoo hah to fall back to here.
I just think it's a no brainer.
Imagine the horror of looking at that child; on the one hand loving the crap out of it, because it's mine, and the other being reminded of the asshole that violated me.
That one moment would not just dissipate into the nether regions of my conscience. I tend to carry shit, especially the crap, with me every where i go. I've done geographic's, half way around the world, attempting to forget shit, and it's like luggage; goes with me where ever i go. So to imagine this type of violence visited on me and then having to own it and having to be reminded about it every single time I hold or caress my child would be painful.
If I was aborted I wouldn't know it and there may be the egg next to the one that was aborted, me, typing this shit right now. But he wouldn't be conscious of it either. So who gives a rats ass?
There's always a possibility of emotional side-effects with every decision we make. For this to be used as an argument against abortion is patronizing at best. Christians don't like to talk about the emotional and physical side effects of pregnancy in and of itself... rape or none.
Pregnancy is a nine month medical condition that is uncomfortable from beginning to end... with nausea, emotional ups and downs, pain, weird goo, more pain, stretching... I mean, I don't understand why someone hasn't compiled a list of all the things that happen to a woman while she's pregnant, and after. Anything I've ever read tries to sugar coat it all, and call it beautiful. It's a rather gruesome process in reality. And to force or coerce someone into this prolonged state of misery is cruel.
Pregnancy should always be voluntary, and only after being fully informed of what all it entails. I have heard, over and over, "I didn't think it would be this hard/painful/gross." And, of course, there's postpartum depression even when some women wanted to be pregnant and have a child.
There are emotional "side effects" to being a parent, too! Watching your child fall down or get hurt... watching them get bullied or have their hearts broken... watching them make mistakes and bad decisions... having them go from loving child to resentful teen. Being a parent has to be painful! Children can really traumatize their parents. And again, to force or coerce someone to be a parent before they're up to the challenge, before they're emotionally ready or mature, is cruel. If someone doesn't feel ready whether emotionally or financially, they should always be allowed to opt out... and never guilted for it.
Pregnancy and parenthood are both huge, life-altering responsibilities that inevitably have "side effects" of some kind. Whether either is worth is depends heavily on the woman's state of mind and station in life when she got pregnant. We should trust women enough to know what they can handle. If they regret their decision later, that is simply what being an adult is all about.
I'm sorry. I just read the definition of "medical condition" and you're right... I'm wrong. I'll call it an epic ordeal. Ha! Is that better?
I think those who "sail through" are the exception. Everyone I know, especially my mother, had an ordeal. Either way, I don't think pregnancy should be treated as lightly as it is, as if it's just some breezy thing women do that's not a big deal.
Obviously, you are not suggesting is should be treated lightly.
LOL, definitely do not take it lightly, married to a midwife here.
The Physiologist part of me does have an observation. Women who have the hardest time during pregnancy, and feel awful all the way through, are those who are Progesterone sensitive. There are definitely some women who are extremely sensitive to progesterone and in whom small fluctuations produce most unpleasant effects. This is most unfortunate because progesterone sustains a pregnancy ! One of the symptoms is a very deep and black depression but there are a whole host of other symptoms. To compound matters an awful lot of Drs are totally ignorant of the fact that some women are progesterone sensitive because it goes against the grain of their training.
Some women come to feel differently than they expected to, after they go through whatever they decided to do. A professional psych might help, since they're trained to help clients bring out and face issues that are most important to them, without the psych's own, personal bias (if they even have a bias).
I don't trust biased opinion, like that article. It's not as bad as I expected. But the only time they used the word "fetus" instead of "baby" or "child" was here: "...societal messages that deny the personhood of the fetus". Well, yeah, they also like to impose their "societal message". I'm pretty much an anti-societal-message kind of guy these days, but most people aren't.
I wanted another kid, but my wife chose to abort one (after I procrastinated getting snipped). It was totally her choice, and I supported her, felt guilty (for her, not the blastocyst or whatever), and I got snipped asap. I never told anyone else about it until now, but only because of all the judgmental people out there.
Well, thanks, but it should be "normal"! Evolution lost control when we--men, especially--started taking over destinies.