In Scandinavia, anything entailing physical violence against a minor is considered a criminal offense (not misdemeanor). Spanking a child carries the same jailtime as beating an adult half to death.
I was quite shocked to hear that spanking is not uncommon in the US, in fact it is closer to the norm (correct me if I am wildly misinformed).
Do you think spanking or any physical punishment of a child is ever acceptable?
One more thing...spanking and other forms of physical violence increases the likelihood that the child will later associate "hitting" as just in certain circumstances of difficulty. This association of violence is in my opinion similar to the way that religion is passed down from generation to generation. How so? The parent hits the child, the child learns hitting is acceptable and will later on most likely result in a parent who also hits their child. They do it because "that is what they have been taught" as that is what "their parents did". Just like how most people are the religion of their parents as "that is what they have been taught" from the cradle.
Now people make mistakes, it is okay! Just learn from your mistakes and read books on the studies of the effects of spanking and violence and stop this tradition from being like a virus that is continuously passed down from generation to generation!
As an Uba Grandmother, and give a lot of information, advice whatever one likes to call it, to my children, on how they handle their children. I know smacking doesn't work - there are much better ways to handle things, plus I never, ever shouted, or got really angry, and when I lowered my voice, that's when kids knew I meant business. but it has to start young. Deprive kids of material things for unacceptable behavior, stop them from going somewhere they really want to go to. Step over them if they are screaming on the floor - ignore them - They have to know you mean business, and the effects last a lot longer than smacking. Plus, I didn't want to hurt myself. LOL - In the long run, especially when kids become teenagers, if you hit them, they are more likely to give you a smack in the mouth. Why wouldn't they. Violence breeds violence. Its the same as religion - why instil fear into ones children, instil respect. I was 'belted' twice as a child, and I will NEVER forget it, as it was totally unwarranted.
Agree totally with Heather and Sassan K.
Lessons have to be learnt another way. It's called being civilized.
It is almost to a tee the strategy used by my parents, though they some times resorted to passive aggresiveness.
Thanks Sassan - it's just commonsense to me - I didn't do 'shout' and I didn't do 'hit". I would get a sore throat or a sore hand - what's the point.
My kids are now in their thirties, and they can't come back at me and say "Do you remember when you smacked the Beejeezus out of us." But they do remember when something was taken off them, or they were stopped from going somewhere, and now laugh about it, and practice the same methods with their children.
Spanking and phisical violence works on children on the short term. It works nonetheless ( I know kids listen to 'the spank' here in my country ).
On the long term, however, this go into the negative.
It depends what you like more: long-term or short-term results. Spanking is the fools way out. I, personally, prefer talking.
Discussing the discussion is a fairly futile attempt to avoid answering the question. If you do not intend to partake in the discussion, but rather resort to ad hom, then you should not have entered it in the first place.
You could have set up your own counterdebate after your own parameters, but you did not - you chose to engage yourself in this debate, knowing full well my opinions and the paramaters from onset. You did not refuse to play, that would be to obstain in the first place, but you are refusing to play by the rules.
It is not I that is stroking my superior ego, you were the one who offered a conclusion without evidence as to show that you are correct and I am wrong. When I create or enter debates I do my best to argue using evidence and logic, Google Scholar being my preferred weapon. I have done nothing but attack opinions, not persons holding them, and I have offered evidence and observations to underline my conclusions. If those are the hallmarks of a superior ego then yes, by your standards I am guilty of having one.
I use it, but sparingly and for specific things. Even then it's only a swat on her diapered butt, not a full out beating.
Oh sorry. Lemme say why. I do it because it's what works. Talking, redirection, time out...none of that means anything to my child.