I know a couple of kids going through PSR (Parish School of Religion). I was not raised catholic so I'm not sure what kinds of things take place there.
I was wondering if anyone has any advice on what to say to these poor kids. It's obviously not a good thing for them because it has the words "school" and "religion" in the title -never mind it being catholic.
I'd love to make a difference in the lives of these two children. I'd love to give them the best tools for thinking for themselves as possible even at this early age.
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Permalink Reply by jared manley on November 26, 2012 at 8:56pm Yes. One will do really well with books. She is geared that way. The other is 1st grade. He's pretty bright and is good at math but it would take a pretty basic book for him. I would have to gently walk him through the concepts. I fear he looks up to me enough that he sometimes pretends to get things that he doesn't. I was like that too with people who were important to me.
Permalink Reply by Maya Komrik on November 26, 2012 at 10:10pm Well I hope you can communicate to this girl and boy that just because they are young doesn't mean that they can be bullied, beaten and abused. I think you are kind and sweet to care about them.
Permalink Reply by jared manley on November 26, 2012 at 10:28pm Thank you!
Permalink Reply by Unseen on November 26, 2012 at 9:03pm Sarah, I would just take issue with calling a boyfriend—even a live-in boyfriend—a stepfather. Boyfriends come and go more frequently than someone who's made the marital commitment.
Permalink Reply by Maya Komrik on November 26, 2012 at 10:12pm I agree. No "spare" girls in my house. And my dad doesn't allow it.
Permalink Reply by jared manley on November 26, 2012 at 9:10pm Thank you. I appreciate it.
I didn't take unseen's comments personal either. I imagine he does that sort of thing to everyone.
I wonder -and I know noone knows me -why people are making sure my ducks are all in a row before they actually give advice on what I asked though.
I do not make unilateral decisions in my relationships. There are at least 2 people involved in any given relation that I have. If I did not keep this in mind it would be nothing more than me walking over someone. That is how it works right?
Perhaps next time I'll propose in a hypothetical fashion in order to avoid interrogation. I understand empathy and why one may be concerned however I tend to not wonder the worse for an individual asking for help in a situation.
Question: Should I use Pepto for an upset stomach?
Answer: Whatever you do be sure to use Icey-hot for sore muscles.
Permalink Reply by Nate Lundgren on November 26, 2012 at 11:40pm I agree, Jared. Unseen did turn on the interrogation and ignored the initial questions. I recommend just ignoring the ironic overstepping of your boundaries by the guy talking about respecting boundaries. hahaha I have found that there are many bored people (like myself) that will make random judgmental and hyper-analytical comments for no good reasons.
My personal strategy is to usually ignore what they say or suggest to them to stay focused on the relevant issues at hand. My advice for talking with and helping these children you care about is to teach them to do what you do and that is to question everything until they feel satisfied with the answers and then to teach them that being satisfied with answers is ok but that doesn't mean the conclusions they have reached or that others have reached are closed subjects. Openly searching is a good thing.
Curious inquiry is a forgotten skill for many adults but kids just need to have a safe space and they will ask more questions than you will ever have time to answer. Give them the kid friendly version of the scientific method and they will be fine. Time is on your side and not the side of the religious teachers.
Religion has an expiration date that science and truth will never have. Having non-religious fun times is probably the best thing for kids since positive messages and experiences last longer in our memories than useless or negative ones do usually. Just teach them that freethinking and humans are fun but religious ideas are boring and confusing. (since they really are) That is all I have to say about this for now. I hope this helps. Take it easy :)
Permalink Reply by RobertPiano on November 26, 2012 at 9:29pm I'm sure the danger to children under the supervision of the catholic church varies greatly from parish to parish. One bad priest or nun can really do some serious harm. They are not held to the same standards as the faculty of public schools and they are shuffled around alot. We spent months studying "Dante's Inferno". Talk about nightmares! That book is a piece of garbage. I had to read "Catcher in the Rye" on my own time.
Permalink Reply by Suzanne Olson-Hyde on November 27, 2012 at 2:13am
Permalink Reply by RobertPiano on November 27, 2012 at 7:31am Obviously religion has two major resources; child indoctrination and limited education. To allow a child to become educated and make her or his own decisions is the right thing to do. I don't think many religious leaders want to take that chance. In the Catholic tradition, I was confirmed when I was 12. Not exactly an adult or in any position to just say no, To be an atheist in Amsterdam is not the same thing as being an atheist in Iran.
Permalink Reply by archaeopteryx on November 27, 2012 at 11:28am RE: "To be an atheist in Amsterdam is not the same thing as being an atheist in Iran." - I agree, Robert, and we have some here on TA from Egypt and Saudi Arabia, and that takes a lot of courage!
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